Powerful + Gentle | Week 44 | Confidence Revolution
In the ancient Hebrew tradition they carried two slips of paper, one in each pocket. On one piece of paper they wrote, “For my sake the world was created.” And on the other piece of paper they wrote, “I am but dust and ashes.” And each person was encouraged to carry these slips of paper in their pockets and remind themselves daily, they exist as big and small simultaneously.
For us to operate at our best we’ve got to strike the right balance between powerful and gentle, and for most of us, that’s really tough.
Here’s how I’ve learned to find the balance between powerful and gentle.
1) I have realized I am good enough to be here.
In an article a few months back I read that Charlie Strong, coach of the UT Longhorns, told his team, “If you weren’t good enough to be here, you wouldn’t be.” And I extend that sentiment to you. You ARE good enough to be here. You HAVE survived your worst ten days. You did land that job. You did graduate. You did provide for you family. You did get through that break up. You’re good enough to be here, because YOU ARE HERE.
Hello, World!
2) I have realized I wear a crown on my head.
A few times a week I read, The Crown on Your Head, to Alexandra. The book’s message is about how each of us is a child of God, and how we each have invisible, magical crowns on our heads. My favorite line is the book is, “No one’s is brighter, no one’s is duller, it’s only a crown of a different color.”
And guys, after the 1,000th time of reading that line, I started to really believe it.
For my sake the world was created. AND, for your sake, the world was created.
3.) I am part of something greater.
The other day Guapo and I were driving to pick up pizza and U2’s song, Mysterious Ways, came through the speakers. “To touch is to heal, to hurt is to steal. If you want to kiss the sky, better learn how to kneel. On your knees, boy!” And for the first time I really HEARD the lyrics.
If you want to touch the sky, you’d better learn how to kneel. Ooohhhhhh!!!!! If I want to reach great heights, I’ve got to realize I am part of something bigger, greater and maybe even unknowable. I’ve got to show humility. I’ve got to be gentle in my ways. I have got to realize, I am but dust and ashes.
As you go through your day today, remember that no one like you has ever been or ever will be. The world needs you to grow into your power and then we need you to help others do the same.
love and grace, catia
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The Courage to Become | Week 36 | Confidence Revolution
Encouraging people and giving them the tools to be who they most want to be, has been my passion since before I had the language for it.
Yesterday I received an email from a high school classmate,
“…I had my child when I was a freshman in high school. I didn’t know much English but despite my struggles, you made a difference in my life back then, always being so nice to me and just showing me that there’s always somebody that just with a helping hand and a smile can change somebody’s world. That person was you!! Just want to say, thank you.”
I cried when I read it and I’m crying now. (Maybe it’s the hormones.)
So many people have given so much to me, have guided me, and have loved me into who I am today and who I continue to become. It is my HONOR to pay it forward, to give you the love and the tools kind folks have given me.
When I have been afraid and in a tough spot, or confused, it has always helped me to look out and find someone who had been THROUGH and who had come out the other side. It always helped me to see someone living out what I wanted to live out. It helped me get my footing, and work up courage until I could stand on my own two feet.
I’m thinking that seeing and hearing from folks who have garnered, the courage to become people they were proud of, will help you too.
Starting next week I am honored to host a guest blog series titled, The Courage to Become: Sister Stories of Hope. Each week we will highlight one amazing women who walked through the fear and uncertainty and became someone she was proud of.
These women have become: artists, dancers, writers, moms, teachers, entrepreneurs, wives, bloggers, photographers, reporters, and business women.
I am sure that their vulnerability, determination and grit will inspire us all!
If you’d like to get their inspirational stories straight to you inbox – join here.
love and grace, catia
Team Duncan | Week 31 | Confidence Revolution
Just a few months ago Tim Duncan retired and I read almost every article about his farewell. Without fail, everyone from Coach Pop to David Robinson to Dirk Nowitzki – they all sang Mr. Duncan’s praises about being a leader mostly by being the greatest team player they had ever seen.
Every article detailed how this 5 Time NBA Champion was always prepared, and how he always performed his best, and how ‘the team’ was his top priority.
“You don't see Timmy beating his chest as if he was the first human being to dunk the basketball, as a lot of people do these days. He's not pointing to the sky. He's not glamming to the cameras. He just plays, and we've seen it for so long it's become almost mundane. But it's so special that it has to be remembered.” Coach Pop continued by saying, “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for Timmy.” And my guess is, neither would the Spurs -- as we’ve come to know them.
Over his career, Tim Duncan devoted himself so much to the sake of “team” that not only did he earn some accolades along the way, but he improved the lives of his coaches and his teammates. He kept his head down and contributed, year after year after year. And like the best leaders do, Timmy didn’t leave a group of men who won’t be able to survive without him, he left them strong and able to stand on their own.
A few weeks ago our church Pastor, Pastor Clark, preached a sermon and he said, the recipe for insignificance is only worrying about ourselves. He taught us that if we want to feel worthy and like we matter, we have to give of ourselves.
So let's ask .... where are we giving?
What teams are we on?
Who counts on you and me?
Where are we leading by example?
Whose life are we making better by contributing our gifts?
Where can we find a team?
Certainly our family can be a team, but so can our best girlfriends, so can our workout class and so can our theater group.
But maybe, just maybe, you're looking to feel like you matter MORE, and maybe you have room for one more team.
Is it in the realm of possibilities that you can start volunteering once a week or once a month at your local Boys and Girl Club, or local YMCA, or local library, or local hospital?
I know we’re all busy, and we certainly don’t HAVE TO volunteer. But how would we feel if we did? How would we feel if we lived such poured out lives that we bettered the lives of those around us? How AMAZING would we feel if we left those around us, strong and able to stand on their own? Pretty damn good, I'm guessing.
AND for those of you out there who are doing it, who are giving ALL you've got, I know you're out there, and I salute you. The world is a better place with you in it. Thank you.
love and grace, catia
If someone sweetly sent you this email and you'd like to become your most confident self, be more joyful, have better relationships and live a life you enjoy - JOIN the
#confidencerevolution here: Join Now.
Here's this week's video for all our Confidence Revolution Champions! I am so proud of you and am so happy for the strides you are making.
Who do you think you are? | Week 19 | Confidence Revolution
I can instantly recall the feeling of being bullied. My insides want to curl up like a rollie pollie. "Please, leave me alone."
I grew up in an upper middle class home in a lower middle class community and the fact that my mom dropped me off in a Ford Taurus station wagon and always had me dressed neatly was enough to send my school mates over the edge. On top of the FLASHY hatchback, I enjoyed school (God forbid) and enjoyed forming relationships with teachers and never felt like I fit in with my peers. Chicken or the egg? I'm not quite sure. My classmates were into video games and pogs and I was into getting an extra 5 points on my spelling test.
Girls would snicker and from time to time confront me face to face. "Who do you think you are?" "You think you're better than us?" "You think you're so good?" "You think you're going to make it?" "Why do you try so hard?" And then the dreaded "telling off" in Spanish. THE WORST. They talked so fast and cursed so well, I couldn't even keep up. Rollie pollie powers, ACTIVATE NOW.
That question of "who do you think you are?" has haunted me ever since. And people from my youth still rattle it off from time to time and most times I brush it off, but sometimes it gets under my skin.
Have you ever felt the need to defend who you are, your passions? Have you ever felt the need to explain why you are making certain choices or lobby folks to get them to support you? Me too. And I think it's about time we stop.
You have permission, FOREVER, (and in my opinion what is in the realm of kind and loving), to do what brings you joy.
BUT...
Sometimes it's not others we are trying to convince, sometimes, we are trying to convince ourselves. Our own negative chatter box floats to the top of our consciousness and we let it overrun our control center and all we hear is, "there are so many other people who already do it better, what's the point?" Or "You're 40! You have a career, why start something new?" Or "You're 25, no one is going to take you seriously. What do you have to say that others haven't already said?" "Why are you trying so hard anyway?"
When that is happening, and you feel your insides over heating, take a step back and check in with your soul. Ask it, "Is this what you WANT to do, will this bring you joy?" If the answer is, YES, then -- keep the bus moving. Ego will try to hold us back (strangely) because it's afraid of not being THE BEST, or, THE FIRST. But soul says, "I want to play too!"
When the question arises, "Who do you think you are?" No need to get overheated or curl in on yourself like a rollie pollie. Just say, "I am God's child and I'm trying something new. I really enjoy this and I'm seeing where it takes me.
love and grace, catia
If someone sweetly sent you this email and you'd like to become your most confident self, be more joyful, have better relationships and live a life you enjoy - JOIN the
#confidencerevolution here: Join Now.
3 Tips To Boost Daily Confidence | Week 17 | Confidence Revolution
3 Tips To Boost Daily Confidence | Week 17 | Confidence Revolution
I heard Simon Cowell (one of the original American Idol judges and a legendary music producer) tell a story about how new talent would walk into his production office and they'd hand over a demo tape. The fact that they were with Simon Cowell meant they had already paid some dues. And Mr. Cowell would listen to the demo and if he liked it he'd say, "Sounds great. Keep working on it for ten or twenty years and come back to me." Knowing that 10 or 20 years of constant effort would make them masters at their craft.
Most times the talent would pick their jaw up off the floor and leave huffing and puffing. "10 or 20 years!"
But Mr. Cowell knew what a lot of us have either forgotten or have never been taught. Progress takes time, and mastery takes even more time. Over night wonders are few and far between and don't usually stand the test of time.
Typing, making a cup of coffee, brushing your teeth -- you've been practicing those things for A LONG TIME -- and so you don't have to think about them, but you're good at them.
If you're just starting to focus on being more loving, compassionate and maybe even more patient, realize it's going to take some time, effort and thought. But don't let that scare you! With every good decision you make for your life, you are lifting the lives of those around you. [share on Twitter] Honoring yourself is the gift that keeps on giving. [share on Twitter]
What Mr. Cowell left out was that the joy is in the growing, learning and stretching. Why rush through it? THROUGH IT is where the magic happens.
Here are three things that will help you walk THROUGH IT joyfully and over time, will make you a master at crafting a life you ENJOY.
Guys, in this video, I attempt to do the nae nae ( I had to Google how to spell that.)
joy and hope, catia
If someone sweetly sent you this email and you'd like to become your most confident self, be more joyful, have better relationships and live a life you enjoy - JOIN the
#confidencerevolution here: Join Now.
AND...Stayed tuned for launch parties for, What Nobody Tells You About Love, (my first book!) coming to bookstores, audio book, Amazon and all those great places December 2016. Join the party invite list here!
What are Your Gifts? | Week 10 | Confidence Revolution
Your gifts are worth celebrating.
Let's Identify Your Gifts
Your gifts are worth being celebrated AND they are worth being explored AND they are worth being shared.
There are legions of us out there who don't feel like we have gifts to offer the world, but we most certainly do.
EACH of us is worthy of being heard, of being honored and of taking part in the conversation. All that life asks of us is that we show up.
Last night I forced myself to go to a neighborhood mom's meeting. It always makes me a little nervous because I don't really know anyone and I know I'll have to stretch and have some 'blind date' type of courage. But during the meeting a fellow mom kindly sat down next to me and we started talking and it went like this... "I get you!" "Me too." "Me too." "I know, right?" My heart could have burst. And I came home thrilled to have met a new friend. But if I would have stayed home in my pjs, I wouldn't have experienced any of it.
It's okay to be scared. We CAN walk with fear, into the unknown because we CAN handle it.
Let's turn our attention inside and realize that we are full of gifts and skill and one-of-a-kind qualities. People will like us and pay attention to us, not because we are the best, but because we see them and we allow ourselves to be seen.
PS. In this video I recommend the book Carry On, Warrior, you can find it here. I finished the book last night and I'm lamenting not having it for a few minutes before I go to sleep every night. Ladies, you're going to love it!
Hey guys - if you're looking to feel better, feel happy and feel confident - I have something for you.
I 100% wrote this in service of you. I want you to find joy in everyday life!
Love!
Airport encounter | Week 2| Confidence Revolution
Why you will succeed.
We're on the road to increased self-esteem! I'm thrilled to be trekking together. Guys, increased confidence relieves so much.
This week's video has to do with originality and success and real life.
Let me know how you're feeling and about any progress you've made. And as always I'm available for specific questions.
