Catia Holm 1/19/21 Catia Holm 1/19/21

Courage to Become | Nina Berenato

“I always tell aspiring jewelry makers to be ready for the long haul. The expectations of what it is to run a small business are skewed. I didn’t have a store until I worked behind the scenes and ran uphill for eight years. I equate it a lot to boxing, you have to take a lot of hits and stay in the ring. ”

— - Nina Berenato

A quick note about The Courage to Become Series and today’s, featured woman.

Hi! Catia here. I am delighted to bring you Season 4 of The Courage to Become! I ask women I admire to share a behind the scenes view of their becoming. We often see the result but aren’t privy to the through, to the transformation. And the through is where all the magic happens. The story you are about to read will buoy you with hope. Being a woman is not easy, but damn, if it can be magical. There are inspirational women everywhere, and Nina is one of them.

Enjoy Nina’s story of becoming. I am a HUGE fan of Nina’s. I love her jewelry, I own 3-4 pieces. I have given her jewelry as gifts, I’ve donated to her Paypal when things got tough during COVID, I truly think she is an amazing person and that she makes the world a better place. She is bright and hard-working and cares about the greater good. Nina is truly an inspiration for me. Please welcome, Nina.

Nina Berenato of Nina Berenato Jewelry

Tell us a little bit about yourself:

I'm a 33-year-old jewelry designer based in Austin, TX. I was born and raised in St.Louis, Missouri, and moved to New York shortly after college. That's where I started jewelry making as an apprentice under a master metalsmith for six years. I moved to Texas about five years ago and have been slowly growing my jewelry business ever since.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?

One of the foundational parts of my personality is that if I see something that feels wrong, I can't just stand by and watch. This means I get involved, and I often speak out or try to make a change in the world. Every time I do this, I feel fear because I know that I am putting myself on the chopping block. There will always be someone out there who thinks you aren't doing enough or aren't going about things the way they would. I believe this stops a lot of people from standing up for things when their gut tells them they should. From internet bullying to confronting me in person, I have had it all, but I don't let that stop me from sticking up for my beliefs. I have always wanted to be a person that changed the world in a positive way, and that has always been my dream, so I have to encounter and defeat fear all of the time to do that.

How did it feel getting started?

Getting started with my business was pretty easy for me because I am an artist, and I started slow. My business evolved into what it is now, slowly over 11 years. I definitely didn't start out knowing I would be where I am today. I always did know that I wanted to have my own fashion business, and I was always excited to create. I love metalsmithing, so once I started learning that - I knew I always wanted that to be a part of my life. I struggled financially for so long within my business and kept another full-time job for the first seven years in business, so it was a lot of work and a lot of sacrificing material things for my art. But it felt good because I was doing what I loved.

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you got started handcrafting jewelry and creating a business?

Most of the obstacles I faced centered around making mistakes because I didn't have a lot of knowledge about finance, business, etc. I learned quickly, but I had to make mistakes to learn the lesson. For example, I spent the first seven years in business pricing my product incorrectly. I accepted many terms with other businesses I worked with that were not in my favor etc. So I had to go through that to learn the lesson and evolve. There's no handbook for the business I created. Not only do we manufacture our product, but we sell other maker's work, so my business is two-fold. I have a brick-and-mortar that I run an online store and we sell wholesale. So I had to try on all those hats and figure out all the ins and outs of all those branches before I could really take-off. And I am still learning and still making mistakes.

What motivates you to continue growing and investing in your business, Nina Berenato Jewelry?

The biggest motivator for me is being able to create an environment where people are really happy, My three employees are really happy when they come to work, and they have fun and feel supported. My customers feel more powerful when they wear my jewelry. I can teach others jewelry making, which gives them a creative outlet. I teach business skills to other aspiring women so they can learn from my mistakes and lead happier, more successful lives. I can use the small amount of buying power I have in my one little shop to support other women makers and artists, therefore improving their lives. So really, just making the world better for the women around me in whatever little ways I can.

Which living person do you most admire?

I most admire my mom. She is definitely where I get my generous spirit from, and she is the ultimate giver. We are getting a lot closer as I get older, and I am enjoying that and appreciating her more and more.

Which talent would you most like to have?

I would love to be able to do other types of art. People assume that because I am great at jewelry making that I can do all types of art, like drawing or painting, but definitely NOT. I wish I could draw ad paint, do collage, or make stained glass, but as of today, my artistic ability begins and ends with jewelry.

What is your most marked characteristic?

Probably my creativity. I have a talent for coming up with something out of nothing, be it a new design idea, a way to give back, a marketing plan. I can just come up with creative ways to do things out of nowhere.

Screen Shot 2020-03-30 at 2.40.59 PM.png

What is your motto? A message that motivates you or helps you along?

My motto is "Leap and the net will appear."

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?

I am most proud to have my three employees who work for me. Building a staff is important to me, and providing them with a place where they enjoy working and can thrive has been something that's made me proud.

What keeps you going when you feel like you are knee-deep in the mud?

I love to be knee-deep in mud because I love a challenge, but when I feel exhausted, I shut off all my social media and emails and watch trash TV, like 90 Day Fiance, and I just zone out for a few hours.

What's one piece of advice you'd give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

I always tell aspiring jewelry makers to be ready for the long haul. The expectations of what it is to run a small business are skewed. I didn't have a store until I worked behind the scenes and ran uphill for eight years. I equate it a lot to boxing, you have to take a lot of hits and stay in the ring. My business has grown to this level because I always kept everything small. I put everything back into the company, and I still make each piece of jewelry myself, so I always try to show aspiring jewelry designers a realistic picture. You're going to have to work for it and work long and hard, so get yourself mentally ready first. Invest in a therapist, train your mind and your body so that you can push through.

What is one piece of advice you would give your 20-year-old self?

Stop drinking alcohol. When I got into my thirties, I changed my habits a lot, and one of those was drinking alcohol. I will drink maybe 2-3 times a year. It's done wonders for me, and I wish I would have had the courage to do it sooner.

You can connect with Nina and shop her empowering pieces on:

Instagram , Facebook and her website - NinaBerenato.com

Hi friend!

Welcome to Bright Light.

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, friend, daughter -- you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

Here at Bright Light, I help parents worldwide enjoy their lives and enjoy their kids.

Family life can be beautiful, but it's not easy. A day in a family can be filled with heartache, guilt, hugs, crying, laughing, and rushing from one place to another.

I help parents create the home life they've always wanted and an environment that feels good for everyone. I teach parents how to strengthen their marriages and relationships with their children.

I believe in the power of parents and families to support and encourage each family member and then take that energy and make the world a better place.

You have the strength to break behavioral patterns, heal intergenerational trauma, and nurture your family in the way you have always wanted to.

To each session, I bring my training as a Certified Conscious Coach, my graduate studies in Marriage and Family Therapy, and my decade-long career as an author and keynote speaker. My approach is multi-cultural, grounded in research and my own experience as the mama of two young girls.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me, I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Want to start feeling really good but not sure where to start? Jump on into our virtual classroom (complimentary of course!) and get a guide on how to walk with confidence and joy! You are divine. You are magic. I look forward to serving you!

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Curious about what a session with me is like? Want to just kind of get a little sampler? I would too! Coaching is a big investment. Also think, how long have you been burdened with THIS and how great would it feel to be liberated from that weigh on your heart, that dark cloud following you around.

Click here to read in depth testimonials from clients.

Schedule a complimentary 30 minute session

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 1/18/21 Catia Holm 1/18/21

Courage to Become | Inez Natalia

“I believe there’s no other love and connection can be more powerful than the one between parent and child. That’s the foundation for all relationships. The emotional blueprint for how we see the world. Raising a kind, strong, resilient, and loving child is rooted in the parent-child connection. And it starts from the inner connection within the parents.”

— -Inez Natalia

A quick note about The Courage to Become Series and today’s, featured woman.

Inez and I met through Dr. Shefali’s Conscious Coaching Institute, and it was friendship at first sight! Inez is wise and loving and so smart! She’s beautiful and kind and willing to sit and listen with her whole heart. She truly is an angel and transformative. I’m lucky to call her a friend! Please welcome, Inez.

Inez Natalia of Inner Mother Power

Tell us a little bit about yourself:

I'm the Founder of Inner Mother Power and a certified Conscious (Re)Parenting Coach.

Inner Mother Power is a movement. She’s me, she’s you, she’s all the women who are brave to say “Nope, no more!” to the deep-seeded cultural conditioning of a mother, and instead, start reconnecting to their deep inner knowing.

The conditioned role of a mother is colored with fear, over worry, anxiety, and control…While the true Inner Mother Power is wise, knowing, trusting, listening, connecting, nurturing authenticity, guiding, empowering, and liberating..

In Inner Mother Power, We believe when a mother liberates herself, she also liberates her children’s children. We envision a world where more mothers can show up daily following their innate knowing, peace, wisdom, and power, so they can be wise guides to their children for the rest of their lives. And that’s what drives us, showing up, every single day.

I help mothers reconnect with their inner power, break the reactivity-shame-guilt cycle, so they can access inner peace & joy in parenting.

I'm also an accidental author and an Entrepreneur.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?

Tough question!

My life has been always about "feeling scared, but I did it anyway" - writing and publishing a book, starting a podcast, becoming a conscious parenting coach, moving my whole life to a foreign country to lead an international NGO, and now THIS: being an Entrepreneur

But NONE of them was a life-long dream.

It's funny how these "dreams" just keep unfolding in a mysterious way. Every step of the way. Not a grand vision, but a tiny cue from the benevolent universe: just take this one courageous step. A leap of faith.

How did it feel getting started?

I still remember the first time I heard about Conscious Parenting.
And how it finally all makes sense to me. It gave me all the answers I need...

Growing up, I understand how all parents always want the best for their children. But despite their best intentions, inevitable wounds are created and the connection is obstructed. The confusion is real. As if parents and children speak different languages.

And now, I understand why and how this happens. Even to those parents who swore they'd raise their children differently.

I believe there’s no other love and connection can be more powerful than the one between parent and child. That’s the foundation for all relationships. The emotional blueprint for how we see the world. Raising a kind, strong, resilient, and loving child is rooted in the parent-child connection. And it starts from the inner connection within the parents.

Being a Conscious (re)Parenting Coach, as a non-parent, was very doubting at first.

The continuous inner chatter:
"Who am I?" "I'm not yet a mother, they won't trust me" "I shouldn't share on my own childhood experience, it would hurt my parents."

But then, the calling was so strong, loud, and clear, I couldn't resist.

Everything points to the same direction: to turn my pain into a gift. Embarking on this journey of healing and evolution, while supporting others to do the same. To give the opportunity for parents and children, to have the sacred connection that they deserve.

For parents to heal and break free, for children to grow up authentically, to be their own person.
To heal the world, one parent, one child at a time.

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you got started?

The mental chatter, being so hard on myself, past traumas, continuous self-doubt, having too much fun with work and deprioritized self-care.

Which living person do you most admire?

Michelle Obama

What is your most marked characteristic?

Gentle compassion, courage, deep, empathy, self-awareness, Resilience

What is your motto? A message that motivates you or helps you along?

"Everything happens, perfectly, the way it's supposed to be" - Srikumar Rao

You are enough, as you are. As enough as you've been, and as enough as you will be.

Everything you're looking for is already within you.

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?:
* Being a country director of an international NGO abroad at the age of 23
* Learning how to ride a bicycle at the age of 25! and nailed it
* Packed my bag and moved my whole life to Bali which led me to
* Wrote & published a book at the age of 26 and met my life, love, and growth partner
* Co-created the highest-rated online parenting course with Dr. Shefali, helped thousands of parents healing their relationship with their children.
* Started a podcast,
* Became a conscious (re)parenting coach,
* Being an Entrepreneur
* Started Inner Mother Power

What keeps you going when you feel like you are knee-deep in mud?

Going back to my breath. To honor all feelings, to allow, hold safe space for me, like how I can hold safe space for others.
To remember every single thing is impermanent. Both joy and pain. Enter the present moment fully.
Go to nature, to reconnect to the inner source, the boundless, limitless power within.
And to take just ONE baby step.

What’s one piece of advice you’d give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

Follow where joy and faith lead you to.
Take that one clumsy baby step. Every single day.
And just play with it. There's magic in it all.

What is one piece of advice you would give your 20 year old self?

Take that adventure. Follow where courage is.
Try something new, fail more, fail early. Embrace mistakes.
Play. Remember to always Play.

Hi! I'm Inez

I've always wanted to be a mom. The kind of mom who isn’t only a parent, but a best friend to the kid. Gilmore Girls was one of my all-time favorite series. My ultimate fantasy of an ideal parent-child relationship.

Oh, I wish it could be that simple.

Growing up, I understood that all parents always want the best for their children. But despite their best intentions, inevitable wounds are created and the connection is obstructed. The confusion is real. As if parents and children speak different languages.

I believe there’s no other love and connection can be more powerful than the one between parent and child. That’s the foundation for all relationships. The emotional blueprint for how we see the world. Raising a kind, strong, resilient, and loving child is rooted in the parent-child connection. And it starts from the inner connection within the parents.

This is what brought me into conscious parenting, where I found the answer I was looking for.

I'm here to support your growth journey

I know how hard parenting is, and for this reason, I am in awe of your courage to embark on a process of change and transformation.

I was trained and certified by Dr. Shefali in her Conscious Coaching Institute. Oprah has endorsed her approach as revolutionary and life-changing. Integrating Eastern philosophy and Western psychology, conscious parenting changes people's lives - now and for generations to come.

Trained in her methodology, I help individuals, couples, and parents to renew their connection with both themselves and their children. I guide parents to see their generational patterns, to heal their inner children, and to re-parent themselves. With compassion and joy, I bring back the power to the parents.

I truly believe everyone has all the answers within and there’s nothing to fix. You just need a safe space to be awakened.

You can reach out and connect with Inez on her website, her podcast - Start Here to Connect

Inez offers a Free Community, Safe Space for Evolving Moms, and a [Free Practical Guidebook] Get 5 Free Tools to Turn Parenting Chaos into Inner Peace, download now:

She’s also teaching and coaching on Facebook and Instagram!

Hi friend!

Welcome to Bright Light.

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, friend, daughter -- you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

Here at Bright Light, I help parents worldwide enjoy their lives and enjoy their kids.

Family life can be beautiful, but it's not easy. A day in a family can be filled with heartache, guilt, hugs, crying, laughing, and rushing from one place to another.

I help parents create the home life they've always wanted and an environment that feels good for everyone. I teach parents how to strengthen their marriages and relationships with their children.

I believe in the power of parents and families to support and encourage each family member and then take that energy and make the world a better place.

You have the strength to break behavioral patterns, heal intergenerational trauma, and nurture your family in the way you have always wanted to.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me, I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Click here to read in depth testimonials from clients.

Schedule a complimentary 30 minute session

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 8/30/20 Catia Holm 8/30/20

Courage to Become | Hayley Hengst

“A few months after THAT, my husband, for whom my puppy love had somehow managed to remain strong for ever since I was 15 years old, sat me down on our back patio, with a bottle of wine, rain pouring down in buckets around us, and informed me that the feeling wasn’t mutual #hegone

And the gene that contributed to my mom’s cancer? Yeah, I was a carrier as well.

That was a hell of a year.

Turns out this stage of life IS hard...in ways I had been quite naïve to when I penciled the article.”

A quick note about The Courage to Become Series and today’s, featured woman.

Enjoy Hayley’s story of becoming. Hayley is a writer, a great one. She has a gift and I am honored that she shared it with us. Hayley and I wrote together at Austin Moms Blog and I always admired how adept she was at sharing her point of view so beautifully with the world. She’s really something else and I know you will adore her. Please welcome, Hayley!

Hayley Hengst from On a Lighter Note

“This Stage of Life? It’s Hard”.

That was the title of a blog post I wrote about five years ago now, that went viral. Then it went viral again. Then again. It was shared over 200,000 times, reached people in at least 10 different countries, got translated into other languages, and for at least two years after writing it, I continued to receive messages and emails from people all over the world telling me how much the article impacted them....how deeply the words resonated....how relieved they were to know they weren’t the only one who felt the same range of emotions the article described.

Kids. Marriage. Sick kids. Troubled marriage. Parenting decisions. Infertility. Miscarriage. The working mom versus stay-at-home mom debate. In the stage of life where you have young kids at home, the struggle is real, and can encompass any number of difficulties.

When I wrote that article, I felt like my “stage of life” was difficult, sure, but not in a tragic way. Just in a mundane “my kid has an ear infection as I write this, my house is a mess, I can’t figure out a good sleep schedule for my newborn, and I’m completely conflicted if I want to send my kindergartner to public versus private school” kind of way.

Happily married with three kids under 6, I was a bit taken off guard by some of the emails that came flooding in as a result of that article....readers regaling me with tales of why THEIR stage of life was hard....and it was indeed difficult stuff. Children with cancer. Husbands who had left them. Financial devastation. I felt sympathetic for these people, while at the same time (if I’m being honest) relieved that my woes were more of the “normal life problem” variety.

Fast forward two years. Fast forward just TWO years, and my mom was diagnosed with late-stage ovarian cancer.

A few months after THAT, my husband, for whom my puppy love had somehow managed to remain strong for ever since I was 15 years old, sat me down on our back patio, with a bottle of wine, rain pouring down in buckets around us, and informed me that the feeling wasn’t mutual #hegone

And the gene that contributed to my mom’s cancer? Yeah, I was a carrier as well.

That was a hell of a year.

Turns out this stage of life IS hard...in ways I had been quite naïve to when I penciled the article.

I’ll save you all the gory details of what the three years sandwiched between THEN and NOW consisted of, but here’s what I WILL say:

When Catia reached out to me and asked me to be a part of her Courage to Become Series, I was incredibly honored. I had read some of the articles other people had written for this series, but not all of them. So I went back and read more. And thought, “um. Why did she ask me to participate in this? I’m not sure I belong in this group. What exactly HAVE I had the courage to become?”.

I thought about it or a while. What I ultimately realized, was this:

After a long hard road, years of which were spent living in the shadow of someone else...years more spent trying to rebuild what “someone else” tore apart....I simply (recently) (finally) have the Courage to just....Become.

“Become”, as in “an active, ongoing, process”. Not necessarily as in “an end-point".

Sound like a cop-out answer?

It’s not.

You see, I’d spent my entire life (well, my entire life since age 15, anyway), just “becoming” what I thought someone else (my husband) wanted me to be. That’s dumb anyway, but in my case, it didn’t even freaking pan out well.

How in the WORLD had I forgotten to ask myself questions like:

What do YOU want?
Who are YOU, separate from HIM?
What’s important to YOU?
What do you want YOUR life to be about?

I don’t know how I’d forgotten to ask those questions, but I had, and it was time to start asking them.

Had my life not fallen apart, maybe I never would have asked. I’m not sure you can become who you are meant to be UNTIL you ask.

So I'm asking them now, and if I’m being honest, the answers are still a little grey. You don’t go 36 years of life NOT thinking through those things, and then all of the sudden have clear answers to them. “Grey” is a transitionary color though, right? It’s in-between black and white. Moving from white, into black, I suppose. As I’ve begun to ask the questions and sort through the answers, here are a few things I do know:

• I want to write. Writing is what I love. It’s what I’m good at. It’s what other people tell me I’m good at. It’s what makes me feel most like me. Why had I not been doing that?

....and so I’ve started writing again. I’ve started a new blog. It’s called The Lighter Note Show. It’s taking off well. I’ve started submitting writings for other websites...and they’re getting accepted. I’ve been paid for a few. I’ve decided I’m going to write a book.

I want to co-host a podcast with one of my best friends. The overwhelming response I received to the Stage of Life blog post all those years ago made me realize that maybe more than anything else, people appreciate “relatable”. They appreciate feeling like they aren’t the only ones who feel the way they do sometimes. That other people have the same struggles and woes and awkwardness and weird thoughts. They also need an excuse to laugh sometimes. I wanted to create a podcast that provided that outlet for people. So why hadn’t I, yet?
…..and so I did. I’m not sure where it will go or what it will lead to, but I’m DOING it at least, and working on the podcast is one of my favorite parts of life right now

I want to challenge myself. I want to set goals that are hard, make a plan to achieve them, and then achieve them. I don’t want to ever become stagnant and “blah” and aimless again. When and why had I become that in the first place?
….. and so I trained for a 15 mile “heavy half” marathon this year. Ran it. And climbed a mountain, too. The highest peak in Colorado, thank you.

Possibly most importantly, I want to love my little boys well. I want them to feel loved, cherished, secure, and happy.
…..and so there is a lot of apologizing in our house. As in, “me to them”. It’s hard to be the patient, kind, gentle and loving mom you want to be when you are emotionally stretched thin, but there’s a lot to be said for apologizing. Being honest with them. Admitting mistakes. Being vocal and expressive in my love for them. Being honest about what’s hard and crappy, but also highlighting all that is good and wonderful and positive.

Some of you impressive and awe-inspiring women in this series have had the Courage to Become some pretty amazing things. You’ve become doctors. Lawyers. Life coaches. Wildly successful photographers. I’m still convinced you guys are all in a different league than me.

I feel certain though there are others of you out there who, like me, lost yourselves along the way somehow. As a result, you may not feel like you’ve “become” anything at all. While I’m certain that isn’t entirely true...you’ve become SOMETHING...you’ve become a wife, or a mother, or a beloved friend....it COULD be true that you haven’t become what you were MEANT to become. Yet. Maybe you haven’t asked yourself the important questions. Maybe you’ve spent too much time trying to become what someone ELSE wanted you to become. Maybe the fact that it’s actually POSSIBLE to become something that makes you feel proud of yourself and fulfilled has eluded you.

I’d encourage you to ask yourself the important questions:

• What do I want out of life?

• Who am I, at my core?

• What makes me feel most alive?

• What is my purpose?

• What am I good at....something I know I’m good at...others tell me I’m good at...I enjoy it....but I’m holding back?

• What am I waiting for?

It takes courage to even ask yourself the questions to begin with. It’s worth it, though.

I’d love to write the book. Have the successful podcast. Climb another mountain. Be able to pat myself on the back daily for a Parenting Job Well Done. If I do all of those things, maybe I will have “become”.

For right now though, there is a lot of beauty in the “becoming”. The process. I don’t want to speed through that.

So cheers to us...the works in progress. May we simply have the courage to BECOME...period.

About Hayley:

Hello From the Other Side

The "single gal" side, that is. The "after the dust has settled a bit" side. The "am I experiencing PTSD from the drama and trauma of the last two years?" side. Kidding, kidding. No PTSD here.

Probably anyone reading this already knows me, and could do without an "About Me". I used to write all the time, and back then, I wrote everything "about me" anyone could ever care to know, and then some, I'm sure. I wrote for Austin Moms Blog. I wrote for my own blog, Mother Freaking. I wrote for Her View From Home. I pretty much was an open book. A lot has changed in my life since then, though (a lot has stayed the same, too).

What's changed?

-I'm not married anymore. This is a negative development on almost all fronts, but I suppose the "positive" aspect of it is that my writings will no longer be chalk full of corny references to my high school sweetheart relationship, that no one wants to hear about. I mean, I thought it was cute. But I guess not. Another positive could be that maybe you'll get to hear some tales of WHAT in the actual WORLD a 38-year old who has never been single, does in the dating world? (If you have any tips or suggestions, please...by all means).

-I don't live with a man anymore. This means there is a lot of pink in my house. I've hated pink my whole life, and then suddenly it was like "If I WANTED to have pink stuff I could"...and so I did.

What's the Same?

- I'm still mama to Three Little Manimals (that's man+animal)

- They still crazy AF

- Writing is still my favorite thing in all of the world. No wait...reading. Writing is a very close second though.

- It's still a toss-up if my Happy Place is a bubble bath, sitting in front of a fire, or lying in the sun. Warmth...just give me warmth. Throw in some sort of a twinkle light situation while you're at it. Throw in a book and maybe some wine, too.

Other Things...

- I think the song "The Weight" by the The Band is the best song of all time, and no matter how many people argue this opinion (fact) with me, I'll never change my mind

- I can't shuffle cards for shit, and one actual GOAL of mine (this is pitiful) during quarantine was to "Perfect My Shuffle Game". I've got the shuffle. Still can't get the stupid bridge.

- I worked at a gym in high school. Some guys that worked there called me at the front desk, secretly, from a back office, pretending that their dad was at the gym working out, and a family emergency had occurred. They needed me to page him. His name was Mr. Jack Meoff. "Please, can you page him". I did. Multiple times. Thus revealing to the world what I already knew...I'm a bit low on common sense. It's fine. I've accepted it, and feel that likely, it means I'm a genius. Like some sort of mad scientist.

You can follow Hayley’s journey at

On a Lighter Note Facebook // On a Lighter Note

pier straigh forward with books - Copy.jpg

Hi friend!

Welcome to Bright Light.

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, friend, daughter -- you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

Here at Bright Light, I help parents worldwide enjoy their lives and enjoy their kids.

Family life can be beautiful, but it's not easy. A day in a family can be filled with heartache, guilt, hugs, crying, laughing, and rushing from one place to another.

I help parents create the home life they've always wanted and an environment that feels good for everyone. I teach parents how to strengthen their marriages and relationships with their children.

I believe in the power of parents and families to support and encourage each family member and then take that energy and make the world a better place.

You have the strength to break behavioral patterns, heal intergenerational trauma, and nurture your family in the way you have always wanted to.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me, I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 8/13/20 Catia Holm 8/13/20

Valley, I believe in you. Thank you for believing in me. Until Soon.

The first time I left The Valley, I was 18.

In 2001, I graduated Weslaco High School and was starting my university days at UT. Weslaco was home. It was where I went to school, where my friends were, and where my family was.

I was excited but also nervous. I remember sitting in those large auditorium-style classrooms and looking around thinking, I don’t know anyone. I went back to the teeny dorm room that I shared with a stranger and wrote my dad an email. It said something like, “Dad, I’m just a number here – no one cares about me. I miss home.” I was in business school, and the people around me were SMART and FROM THE CITY! It was a stark contrast to growing up in Weslaco. In Weslaco ( a one high school town back then) I always knew my teachers and principals and let’s face it, every teacher I had knew my parents were involved – so I always felt like I mattered. I did not feel ANY of that at UT.

My dad wrote me back and told me to keep trying. He reminded me that all I had accomplished in Weslaco was not overnight; it all took time. And so I stayed, and I tried. I made friends, got involved – and three years later – I graduated. **Interesting side note. I graduated from high school with a lot of college credit – thanks, WHS! Go Panthers!! And so my parents told me this before I left for UT, “We will only pay for three years of college. So, earn your degree in 3 years.” And since I am the oldest and I believed everything they said, and since I didn’t have any money – I earned my degree in three years. I would later learn - that was a lie – and they would have paid for my college for as long as it took. Parents. LOL

I’d come back weekends to watch my younger brothers play football and for any other important occasion – you know how Mexican families are. Together.

After UT, I went to graduate school in Houston and was further away from The Valley. But I always knew I could come home. I knew there were people —my parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and family friends that feel more like angels --- who wanted me to visit.

In my 20s, I traveled, I dated, explored with my young life – but like a boomerang, I always came back home.

When Guapo and I were early on in our relationship – he would say things like, “it’s your parents’ home, it’s not your home.” And I’d say, “No. It is my home.” And he’d always stay confused – wondering why a 29-year-old woman would still call her parents’ home - home. I remember the first time he came to Christmas in The Valley. We gave him a uniform, and he worked Christmas Eve at Holiday Wine and Liquor – like a good boyfriend!

I managed the store; he managed the line of customers. At that time, Guapo was a pretty accomplished lawyer – and he wasn’t exactly used to working late on Christmas Eve helping customers out to their car with boxes – but he was in love!

Later that night, we went to my Abuelita’s for buñelos and tamales, and he had a big grin. “This is so nice.” “Yes, it is,” I said.

—

When Alexandra was only a few months old, Carlos, my youngest brother and I rented a home. It was a three-bedroom house—one bedroom for Carlos, one for me, and one for Alexandra. One week a month – Alexandra and I would drive from Austin to McAllen. My mom got to spend time with Alexandra, and I got to work at Holiday. We’d have pizza night and movie night – and God bless Carlos and his now-wife Ashley – I’d be pumping breast milk and interrupt their date to take the breast milk to the refrigerator. The things we do!

Uncle Los being epic with baby Alexandra

Guapo and I grew, and Luciana came along, and we moved to Central America. And the more and more Guapo evolved as a papa – the more he said things like, “I am never leaving the girls. They can always live with us; maybe I’ll pay them not to go to college and hang out with me.” I looked at him and said, “You’re a Mexican dad, after all.”

And then, in casual conversation, I said, “Imagine Alexandra marrying someone and moving to another country. Imagine having to travel 12 hours to see your kid.”

That notion sat with us and when we knew we were coming back to the US – we said, “Let’s go be with family for a while.” And so after Central America, in October of 2019, we moved back to The Valley.

The last year has been full of transitions.

New schools, friends, a new house, a change in lifestyle, and then, Corona. My goodness.

Guapo and the girls and I have been through a ton.

When Corona started in March, Guapo got sick, and we thought it was Corona. Guapo had already quarantined for ten days in our room. So I was the mom, nurse, cleaning lady around the clock for a few weeks – and I was already frazzled. Then one morning, his lips became discolored, and so we decided that he go to the ER. But moms don’t get to fall apart – at least not right away – because there’s still snack time, playtime, lunchtime, and bedtime. He packed his bag and went to the ER, and I did THE GROUP TEXT—the one where you ask people for help and prayers.

Immediately, everyone came to bat in big ways.

My Uncle dropped food on my doorstep, and within the hour, a family friend had called her suegra – and the suegra worked at the hospital, and she was able to get me information on Guapo that I would not have gotten otherwise. People just sent us their love in whatever way they could. Paper goods so I wouldn’t have to wash dishes, flowers, food, prayers. Love looks like a lot of things.

Christmas Brunch with framily - December 2019

During our time here, the girls have played with family, eaten raspas, and walked through the Valley Lemon orchards. They were flower girls for the first time and got to see their Uncle Los and Tia Ashley marry. When we drive by Weslaco stadium, Luci yells, “Panthers! Mommy – you went to Panthers!”

Weslaco High School Football game - October 2019

Alexandra sings the Holiday Wine and Liquor jingle every time she passes a Holiday. Alexandra just kind of thinks everyone has a business. She asked her grandparents to give her a building ( an entire one) – so she can open a gift shop. She wants to sell lemonade from the gift shop for $5.00. It’s excellent lemonade.

Alexandra and her Uncle Los at Holiday Wine and Liquor

For a while, Alexandra called it, “Mexi-callen,” instead of McAllen.

The girls have had so much fun with my parents. One night, my mom told Alexandra, “mi casa es su casa.” So about a month ago as we were leaving my parent’s house – Alexandra rearranged some decorations. And she said, “this is my house too.” “Yes, it is sweet girl.”

By being here in The Valley, I got to remember what it was like to feel The Valley breeze and see the palm trees swaying in the wind. I got to see friends on a quick run to the grocery store and be called, Catia Hernandez. And people ask – even still – are you David and Nellie’s girl? Yes, I am.

My 36th birthday cake and song in my dad’s office

I was able to officiate the wedding for my brother and sister-in-law.

Getting to officiate my brother’s and sister-in-law’s wedding

Plus, I got to be with my parents during all of this Corona mess. Did you know I have worked for my parents pretty much my entire life? I do ALL sorts of things for Holiday Wine and Liquor and the Texas Valley Lemons – but I was able to kick it into high gear for Holiday when Corona hit – and that was a big blessing.

And even with all the junk going on – I was able to get grounded. To feel loved and welcomed – to see old friends, to take morning walks on familiar trails.

I was able to spend Sunday afternoons with my folks and ask my mom for help with things that I could do myself if I had to. And, this was the first time in a long time that I was able to celebrate mother’s day and father’s day with my folks – in person!

I drove on the farm and got stuck in the mud. I was able to get all my art fixed up by my favorite frame shop and eat greasy taqueria. I even taught Guapo how to say things like, “this chick.” (You will only get this is you’re from The Valley.)

The Valley and this community is so dear to me.

Many people here have believed in me and have given me actual opportunities. They have taken leaps of faith on me, and I am truly humbled by it.

They’ve let me lead their groups, invited me to sit on boards, loaned me their church alters, supported my book and become my clients.

Guys, the Barnes and Noble on Nolana ( in McAllen) gave me my first ever Barnes and Noble book placement, got posters printed with my face on it, and held a book signing for me. Then, on book signing day – the staff gave me a locket that I still wear to this day. I’m grateful to Barnes and Noble – but I know that wasn’t Barnes and Noble – that was Valley people supporting other Valley people.

The Valley believes in me – and I believe in The Valley.

Fernando Rivera, Kay Jancik, me, Erren Seale - at a public speaking event at St. John’s Episcopal - May 2018

Susie Robertson and me - love her! - at a public speaking event - May 2018

Dora Brown and me at a keynote address for RGV Women of Purpose - March 2018

A keynote address - RGV Women of Purpose - March 2018

Emceeing - The Festival of Color - October 2019

Vanessa Pardo and Monique Condes - my girlfriends who always cheer me on!

When my edges are unraveling – The Valley, Weslaco, my parents, my family – they shore me up. They get me good and strong for the next adventure. And that’s what the last year has felt like.

Tomorrow, I will leave The Valley again.

We bought our first home (does this make me a real adult?), and we are going to settle in for a while, hopefully, a long while.

I’m looking at all the cardboard boxes I’ve packed, our rental house in shambles, teary and grateful for the last year.

Guapo and the girls drove ahead, and so I have some time to write and think.

I never quite know where life is taking me ( us ), but I am happy that I got to come back to The Valley, and live here – with my handsome mid-western husband and my two amazing girls.

In my work, sometimes parents ask me, “how do I get my kids to stay, to come back? I don’t want them to leave.” And I always say, “Be kind, actively welcome them. Don’t try to control them. Give them stability. Create a safety net of love and understanding. Cook them a meal. Leave space in your life for them – maybe even some space in your house. Let them explore and play and always welcome them home for love.”

My mom and dad are coming over tonight. They are bringing me Koko’s fajitas, and we are going to have a socially distanced last supper before tomorrow’s big move. And I am just full of gratitude.

The Valley is in a tough spot right now, but it’s such a special place. Full of grit and love and hope.

Valley – you’re such good people. I believe in you. I believe in your dreams. I believe you are strong. I know you will overcome.

Until soon, friends. You know I’ll be back.

Hi friend!

Welcome to Bright Light.

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, friend, daughter -- you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

Here at Bright Light, I help parents worldwide enjoy their lives and enjoy their kids.

Family life can be beautiful, but it's not easy. A day in a family can be filled with heartache, guilt, hugs, crying, laughing, and rushing from one place to another.

I help parents create the home life they've always wanted and an environment that feels good for everyone. I teach parents how to strengthen their marriages and relationships with their children.

I believe in the power of parents and families to support and encourage each family member and then take that energy and make the world a better place.

You have the strength to break behavioral patterns, heal intergenerational trauma, and nurture your family in the way you have always wanted to.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me, I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Want to start feeling really good but not sure where to start? Jump on into our virtual classroom (complimentary of course!) and get a weekly guide on how to walk with confidence and joy! You are divine. You are magic. I look forward to serving you!

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 7/15/20 Catia Holm 7/15/20

Courage to Become | Lisa Jauregui

I'm proud I stayed course and followed my passion - in all the forms it took over the years - from working with clients to starting a YouTube Channel. At the time I had no idea or grand plan that it would lead to what we are doing today with BK Beauty, but since launching last year, my husband has been able to join me now full time. We designed a life, that would have felt like a dream years ago - in terms of passion for our work, and being able to also prioritize family.

A quick note about The Courage to Become Series and today’s, featured woman.

Hi! Catia here. I am delighted to bring you Season 4 of The Courage to Become! I ask women I admire to share a behind the scenes view of their becoming. We often see the result but aren’t privy to the through, to the transformation. And the through is where all the magic happens. The story you are about to read will buoy you with hope and encouragement. Being a woman is not easy, but damn, if it can be magical. There are inspirational women everywhere, and Lisa is one of them.

Lisa is graceful and kind and a true powerhouse. I watch her from afar and she absolutely inspires me to be softer and more powerful at the same time. She has taken her passion, beauty, and grown it into a business all while rooting it in kindness. Please welcome, Lisa.

Lisa J from BK Beauty

Tell us a little bit about yourself:

I am a mom to two girls, and my husband and I own a beauty brand, BK Beauty. My brand evolved from a passion I've always had for makeup artistry. Working at a makeup counter in college, lead to having always having that makeup artistry in my life in all sorts of ways. For years I had a wedding makeup business as a side job to my full-time job in Advertising. I'd work M-F in advertising, and work weekends doing wedding makeup. After having my second daughter, I started to come to terms with needing to retire from the wedding business. While I loved the work and my clients, the schedule of having every weekend booked and away from family was wearing me down. I started making videos teaching women about makeup and uploading them to YouTube to still practice my passion. Five years later, that would lead to launching BK Beauty. Besides YouTube and BK Beauty, I enjoy fitness and immersing myself in self-discovery and self-improvement content.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?

I'd have to say starting my brand. I remember looking into starting a brand when I was a makeup artist before I was on YouTube or had any community (I prefer this over "followers") :) There is a lot that goes behind starting a company. I am so fortunate that my husband supported this dream of mine and runs the business parts that are not my areas of interest or knowledge.

How did it feel getting started?

It was exciting and scary. We are 100% self-funded, so making that initial investment to place our first purchase order was terrifying! As you get further along, you start to realize the additional expenses that arise that you didn't even consider when you started. Our initial investment quickly doubled as we began to source everything we would need to operate fully. The process was long, but exciting. It was gratifying seeing my product come to life! After we launched and started to get customer feedback, that was scary too. You hope your customers love your product as much as you do.

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you started BK Beauty?

Oh gosh, so many obstacles when we started. The first would be finding a partner and manufacturer that would work with us. After sampling about a dozen, we finally found ours. We launched out of our home, and the first three months of our business, our house looked like a warehouse shipping facility. We had no intention of renting a space or hiring anyone immediately because we thought we could manage it ourselves. After a few months of juggling the kids, my YouTube Channel, and BK Beauty, we decided we needed a space and to make our first hire. We also learned that timelines never run as planned initially, and having the patience to get it exactly right is more important than rushing the process.

What motivates you to grow BK Beauty?

We've been able to use BK Beauty as a vehicle to give back in ways we never could do personally. That is something I am proud of. The community of women around the world that have supported me on YouTube motivates and inspires me. The letters, emails, and comments I receive are so rewarding. My daughters also motivate me. I hope they see the passion and hard work in me and that one day, that helps shape them into having the courage to follow their dreams.

Which living person do you most admire?

I admire Kendra Scott because she's an incredible example of an entrepreneur who has built an incredibly successful brand. She reinvented her brand and business and sustained the growth longterm, but more importantly, she uses the success of her brand to give back in significant ways. Mentorship and philanthropy is a core part of who she is. I admire that. I look at the work she is doing in communities through her brand's success, and I am inspired to follow.

Which talent would you most like to have?

Dance! I so wish I could dance! I mean REALLY dance... not just act a fool at a wedding.. but the kind of dance you see on Instagram. :)

What is your most marked characteristic?

Hmmm... I would have to say empathic if that is a characteristic? I have always been someone who takes on others' feelings. In a lot of ways, I think that is a positive characteristic. Forgiveness and giving the benefit of the doubt are two things I am quick to give. I love deeply, and I want to be loved deeply. In other ways, it's something I have to manage and balance. It can cause anxiety, self-doubt, and trouble identifying important boundaries for self-love and protection. This is something I only recently am starting to realize and work on.

What is your motto? A message that motivates you or helps you along?

If you are uncomfortable, you are growing. Listen to your instincts; they are always right.

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?

My girls are what I am most proud of. Not sure if that qualifies as an accomplishment, but I am proud of their hearts. They are kind, loving, compassionate, and caring. They love animals, which I think says a lot about their heart. :) That makes me proud. Professionally I am proud that I turned a passion into a business that my husband and I now work together. To be honest, I spent my 20s not knowing what I wanted to be professionally. I always loved makeup but had this idea that I needed to go to college and get a "real" job after. I worked in Advertising for a few years. I am grateful for that experience because it validated that makeup was my true passion and that having a "real" job and a good paycheck wasn't truly fulfilling. It wasn't leading to happiness. I'm proud I stayed the course of following that passion in all the forms it took over the years from working with clients to starting a YouTube Channel. At the time, I had no idea or no grand plan that it would lead to what we are doing today with BK Beauty, but since launching last year, my husband has been able to join me now full time. We designed a life that would have felt like a dream years ago in terms of passion for our work and being able also to prioritize family.

What keeps you going when you feel like you are knee-deep in the mud?

When I feel overwhelmed, a long run and a good Tony Robbins talk will get me out of it—also disconnecting a bit. I have to disconnect when I feel that way. It's tough because social media is a big part of my job, but I always want to show up authentic and honest. And sometimes, the truth is I need some space to recenter.

What's one piece of advice you'd give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

Be patient, and stay true to your mission and your brand. Build community by showing up and offering real value. Be honest with that community, serve them.

Lisa J is a mama, wife, and all-around amazing woman. She is the founder of BK Beauty.

Driven by a passion for beauty and mission of kindness, BK Beauty creates makeup products and tools that offer a luxurious feel with flawless performance.

BK Beauty helps make application effortless and inspires creativity while celebrating beauty inside and out. With every purchase, a donation is made to inspire

kindness.

You can shop BK Beauty and connect with Lisa at:

YouTube: lisajmakeup // Instagram: @lisajmakeup //Facebook: LisaJMakeup

BK Beauty // Instagram: BK Beauty

Hi friend!

Welcome to Bright Light.

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, friend, daughter -- you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

Here at Bright Light, I help parents worldwide enjoy their lives and enjoy their kids.

Family life can be beautiful, but it's not easy. A day in a family can be filled with heartache, guilt, hugs, crying, laughing, and rushing from one place to another.

I help parents create the home life they've always wanted and an environment that feels good for everyone. I teach parents how to strengthen their marriages and relationships with their children.

I believe in the power of parents and families to support and encourage each family member and then take that energy and make the world a better place.

You have the strength to break behavioral patterns, heal intergenerational trauma, and nurture your family in the way you have always wanted to.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me, I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 6/24/20 Catia Holm 6/24/20

Courage to Become | Shea Jones

Becoming a youth pastor who has never been to seminary is also an obstacle for me. It was one of my pastor's ideas and sounded crazy to me at first. But, he said... “you're already doing it, Shea.” So, I worry about the teaching aspects sometimes and try to overcompensate with the connection, fun, community & service parts, but I'm also a natural learner so I think deep down I'm capable.

A quick note about The Courage to Become Series and today’s, featured woman.

Enjoy her story of becoming. Shea makes me grin from ear to ear because she cares so much. I can feel her caring through the internet. She loves her people and her community well, she wants the best for all of us, and she’s not afraid to work hard at those things. Please welcome, Shea!

Shea Jones from Austin New Church

Tell us a little bit about yourself.

I'm a mom of two sassy elementary-aged girls. A wife, friend, daughter, youth pastor (for 4 yrs), and accountant (for 20). I've always been a bit of a rebel, from a young age. I could never shake my head yes if my gut said no. Which caused strife when I was younger and I learned how to navigate it better, to show discernment in responding, to make it count, to be heard, and helpful. I was raised by people who told me my voice mattered which I didn't realize was somewhat uncommon, so I have always believed it does, matter.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?

I majored in government at UT Austin and always wanted to be in politics or become a lawyer. I've done neither.

I love that I get to tell my students that I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. And that I added a new career (pastoring) at 38 yrs old. I didn't love school so I think that's part of why I never became a lawyer... although I worked a lot while I went to college (and had a decent amount of fun) so maybe that's why I didn't totally love it. Because I do love learning. I haven't been in politics because I think because I realized how risky, and uncertain it is and that doesn't pair well with my control-freak tendencies.

I'm also not sure I have thick enough skin.

Although... because my life & church is so driven by social justice issues in a way I feel like I get to do parts of both, just without the official title. I also have super loved getting involved in local politics.. my city and school board, etc. -- just taking every opportunity to get to know them because I feel like local politics can be super hard to feel connected to and understand.

Shea with the Austin New Church Students

How did it feel getting started?

I feel like I'm always getting started.

I've never been a visionary or dreamer. Any job or opportunity I've gotten hasn't been because I've dreamed it up. It's generally been pointed out by someone else that I should try it. Or I've just tried to work hard, kind, and be impactful wherever I've been, which I think has left me open to the things that have come my way and been a part of my journey. My husband is a dreamer.. he's creative... know's where he wants to retire & what he wants to be doing (fly fishing)... and I've always been pretty content to just be with my people, so I'll pretty much be where he is with some books. At first, I used to feel inadequate around him because I didn't have a dream to be a rock star or write music, but I realized it's what makes us work, and it's okay to not know what you want next. But be curiously & optimistically open for whatever presents itself.

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you got started pastoring?

When I think about my life I think I have always been blessed with family, resources, support & friendship.

Some general challenges in my life have been my dad committing suicide when I was 24 (due to alcoholism & depression) and my parents’ divorce I believe. My husband also had a little sister pass when he was in middle school from Muscular Dystrophy so we're very aware that our lease of parenting, love, relationships are very much affected by both having lost someone in our immediate families sooner than you're generally 'supposed' to.

We know that makes us appreciate what we have & try to be present, but we also know it makes us worry & fear. The people we have lost are never far from our thoughts and that can be both a good & bad thing I think. Becoming a youth pastor who has never been to seminary is also an obstacle for me. It was one of my pastor's ideas and sounded crazy to me at first. But, he said... “you're already doing it, Shea.” So, I worry about the teaching aspects sometimes and try to overcompensate with the connection, fun, community & service parts, but I'm also a natural learner so I think deep down I'm capable.

I've also 'been in church' my whole life so that should count for something. The difference is since I didn't have a clue I'd be a pastor one day (was NEVER on my radar) I didn't listen in church the way you would if you thought you'd be teaching it one day. Maybe that's the lesson.. we should all be prepared to teach anything we're learning. Another recent obstacle is the kidney donation thing that happened 2 years ago, but I don't talk about that a ton bc it feels weird. It was a super-spiritual process for me, which would be a whole other paragraph+ but the gist is I didn't want fear to lead my decision. I felt it was important for my kids to see that, and I do believe that as we can we are meant to give back all we have, because Jesus told us to.

What motivates you to be a pastor?

I am motivated mostly by CONNECTION. One of my pastor bosses had me do the Strengthfinders 2.0 test and that was revealed to me. It makes me realize that connection drives most of what I do, how I respond, where I find my purpose & my gratitude. I can't stand fluff, or surface, or cliche for the life of me. That is the downfall. I crave authenticity to a fault - probably.

Which living person do you most admire?

I've always LOVED Oprah. When she had her last show about 8-9 years ago I had a watch party with like 30 friends. We made Oprah's favorite cocktail (Moscow mule), we served O-shaped food. It was a blast. And felt a bit like the end of an era. Oprah stood up for all people before it was cool. I had friends who didn't like her because she was too inclusive. Which is probably why I love her.

Which talent would you most like to have?

Singing! I literally can't carry a tune but I love to sing. And maybe sometimes I can if I'm lucky but the problem is I'm so tone-deaf that I wouldn't know it. And my husband's a musician so it extra hurts. I distinctly remember my dad telling me in my grandparent's church when I was around 8 years old that I couldn't sing... I actually have always felt VERY loved by him despite how he left this earth, and know he was trying to be funny, but his comment has stuck with me.

What is your most marked characteristic?

I think I'm kind of an asshole. I've gotten better at reigning it in, but as I've said I kind of always have been an IDGAF person. In fact, I should probably read a book that says "You should give a F more than you do!" LOL. I know this helps me in times but it has hurt relationships too, so I've had to learn from it. Learn how to become a better LISTENER. Actually work at that skill. I did when I started having coffee with people after the last presidential election, who voted differently than me. I knew politics weren't going away and neither was social media, so I really wanted to do a sampling and LISTEN, CONNECT, UNDERSTAND (even if we don't agree), then figure out how to TREAT each other better. Figure out why I responded so passionately inside myself.

What is your motto? A message that motivates you or helps you along?

I feel like my favorite motto changes about every quarter or so based on what I'm experiencing or learning at the time. I got this from a recent online boundaries course (by Kay Bruner) ... "literally the only thing we can control is the way we love each other."

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?

I'm proud to be a good friend, mom, wife, and granddaughter. I'm proud to love teenagers well just as they are. To create a safe space for them to explore their faith. To be fully themselves, to not fear to ask hard questions or uncertainties... to fear silence about those things instead. I wasn't comfortable with the title youth pastor at first but I am now. And still today I will Google the word pastor and then think... yes, I am spiritually guiding teens. I am a pastor.

What keeps you going when you feel like you are knee-deep in mud?

I'm not one to open up to many when I'm down but I can be vulnerable with a few close friends, and especially my mom and husband. The funny thing about Tommy (my husband) and me is we were head over heels in love and talked marriage early on but he was oddly practical about making sure I was going to be someone who would compromise and be a good teammate.

There's a story early on of me giving him an ultimatum to pick his rock band or me. And he called my bluff, which I wasn't used to, and he picked the band.

It was a humbling two day break up and I had to come groveling back and ask for help. And I think it shaped the tone of our marriage, in which we take turns leading each other. But it starts with creating space for each other to be vulnerable.

What’s one piece of advice you’d give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

Listen to you gut. It's generally trying to tell you something. It could be Jesus.

What is one piece of advice you would give your 20 year old self?

You're doing the best you can with what you know right now.

Isn’t Shea amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to reach out squeeze her neck right now.

I am so grateful that she shared her story with us. So much hope and forward motion in it. I loved it!

I know you’ll want to connect with Shea, here’s how you can.

Facebook , Instagram, Austin New Church , Austin New Church Students on Instagram, Austin New Church Students on Facebook

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational and TEDx speaker , Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 6/8/20 Catia Holm 6/8/20

How are you after last week?

Ten days ago I sent out a Weekly Wisdom email - and the topic was how to sustain change.. And then, a tsunami of events, emotions, and information came barreling at America.

If you are Black and reading this, I hold you in my heart and my actions. I am learning and unlearning and acting on your behalf. I am sorry and embarrassed that I didn't know just how much you have gone through and go through. I am committed to not only doing better - but to DOING WELL on your behalf. I will be there for you in my words and thoughts and actions. I know this week was a tsunami, an onslaught, and I'm sorry that you are in the middle of all of it.

--

If you are not Black, I see you, and I feel you. As a leader of people who want to grow and do their best ( I am so proud of you ), I wanted to be there for you, and so I didn't want to be silent. I wanted to be vocal and push the envelope (of my social media - but most of all of my heart and comfort.)

When you learn that you have been blind and worse, complicit in the hurting of others - it is a gross, all-encompassing feeling. The murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and Ahmaud Arbery have affected me like nothing ever has before. It has taken over my head and heart. And I suppose that's a good thing.

Here's something significant that I want you to know.

You have the skills to be a group of people who bring about change. I know that you are who we have been waiting for.

I'm not sure how long you have been with me ( reading my work and showing up for me) for some of you it's recent, and for others, it's been ten years. I know that if you are here - you are GOOD and you are STRONG, and you WANT GOOD FOR THE WORLD.

I know it.

Deconstructing beliefs takes time and intentionality. Change takes time. Looking at ourselves and where we have unconscious biases will not be easy. Seeing the hurt that our brothers and sisters have endured for centuries will break your heart open - but I urge you to look at it - don't look away.

Let it break your heart open. It's in the breaking of your heart that you will transform.

How do I know this?

Because I have been there before, and so have you.

As my teacher, Dr. Shefali, says, “pain is a portal.”

Each of us has that time when our hearts shattered, and we thought, "this is the end, we cannot endure anymore." After prayer, intention, and love, we started to feel lighter, stronger, and freer. We transformed.

Maybe it was a bad break up; maybe it was the loss of a loved one, maybe it was a job loss, maybe it was a suicidal attempt, and maybe it was drug addiction. Something brought us to our knees, and we begged for relief. Do you remember that time?

And yet, here you are. Standing tall, taking deep breaths, evolving, being a blessing to yourself and others.

--
And so I know, you and me, we were made for a time such a this.

I believe in you.

Here's what I am doing to take action.

Also, last night I watched, Just Mercy on Netflix, and I am a changed woman. I will literally never be the same. I highly recommend it. It will break your heart WIDE OPEN. You will move into action after watching it. God Bless Bryan Stevenson.

Jamie Foxx, Bryan Stevenson (American Civil Rights Lawyer and angel ), Michael B. Jordan

Let me know how I can help you on this journey of unlearning.

so much love and hope for you and for us, catia

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 9/16/19 Catia Holm 9/16/19

We are packing our bags and....

In 2018 our youngest, Luciana, turned a year old. And as parents of young children, EVERY SINGLE PERSON advised us to, “savor the moment,” and “enjoy the girls.” They told us “things will go by in a flash,” and “don’t miss it.” And so Guapo and I looked at each other and thought, we’d better listen.

So we made a plan. We would slow down. We would take things off our plates. We would choose to BE with our young girls and cherish the days.

So in March of 2018, we decided we’d leave our beloved Austin, put our careers on hold and we’d take a life sabbatical.

We’d go somewhere where life was slow, and we could just be together.

A few months later, in May of 2018, we gave away half of our belongings, stored the rest, and moved to Panama. Panama, Central America. All of it went pretty quickly.

Guapo did all the planning, and I packed our bags. I landed on Panamanian soil, sight unseen. I didn’t do a lick of research. I just trusted.

We arrived with 6 suitcases, 2 car seats, a stroller, a 3.5-year-old and a 1.5-year-old.

The night we arrived, Guapo assured me a luxury van was going to pick us up and take us to a hotel. When we walked out of the airport into the wet humidity, I saw no luxury vans. But I did see some janky vans. “That one!” He was pointing to the janky van. “Oh my God,” I thought. I got in the van, and it didn’t have a way to affix the car seats. “Great,” I’m in a foreign country, and I can’t keep my baby safe. What did we get ourselves into?

But then we walked into our new home, and I thought, “alright, alright, alright!” It was clean and beautiful and had so much space! Turns out, the cost of living in Panama is A LOT less than Austin.

The girls’ bedrooms were the priority, and so we went to go buy a crib for Luci, and Guapo asked for “ropa” to tie the crib to the top of our rental car. And so they kept sending him to the 2nd level of the store – where they sold….CLOTHES! Lasso. It’s a lasso. We needed a lasso to tie the crib.

We have SO many of those stories.

It took us about 3 months, but we learned a new way of life. A slow one. When I arrived, I continually wanted to be productive and busy because that’s how I had always operated. But in Coronado, there was nothing to do. There was the beach, the gym, and golf. Those were your choices. And so, I learned to just sit and not rush from place to place.

And then, the most magical part started to happen. We began to BECOME more attuned to our children. We spent days, seeing them for who they were. We learned better ways to parent. We took so much off our plate that we did what we set out to do – we enjoyed our girls. We spent countless hours in the pool and in the hammock and dancing in the kitchen. We absolutely changed the dynamic of our family. We learned how to be intentional with words and time, and we have seen our girls flourish because of it.

And once the four of us got our bearings, we started to settle in, and build a community. We made Coronado, ( a small beach town 90 miles west of Panama City) our home. We became friendly with the fruit stand attendants, the beach club staff, the team at our local salon. I took a part-time job as a gym instructor and even got a Zumba Strong certification along the way. Guapo went surfing and started Jiu-Jitsu. And we had BBQs and game nights and play dates with friends. We really loved people, and they loved us back.

And now Alexandra is 5 and Luciana is rounding the corner on 3, and it’s time to pack our bags and go back to Texas.

We have had a rough several months here health-wise and a few nights ago our home got broken into while we were sleeping. But even though the last few months have been rough – I am still so glad we came.

We did it.

I mean, I’m just a girl from Weslaco. I grew up in the same house my entire life. Getting up and moving to a foreign country was a big deal for me. And I did it. I figured it out. I figured out the traffic and directions. I figured out how to teach a gym class in Spanish! I figured out health care and school systems. I figured out how to build a community, one intentional act at a time.

Today, I told some of my friends we were moving, and my girlfriend said, “What are we going to do without your light?” She squeezed me tight. And I cried.

Never in my wildest dreams did I picture our life sabbatical unfolding the way it did.

It was rich in experience and love and courage. We did exactly what we set out to do – we slowed down, and we loved Alexandra and Luciana well. Which may sound cheesy, but how good do you feel when someone loves you wholly and completely? We are all the better for it.

What an adventure.

If you’re out there and you’re wondering if you should take a leap. DO IT. If you’re wondering -- it’s because your soul knows it needs to stretch. It’s because your soul knows that there’s so much to be experienced and learned and felt and enjoyed when you take the leap. I can’t tell you how your leap will turn out, I can’t promise you it’ll turn out like a fairy tale, but I can guarantee you that you will be delighted when you realize just how strong and capable you are. Go for it, adventure awaits. And come back and tell us the story.

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 5/21/19 Catia Holm 5/21/19

Infinite Love | Show Up for Your Life

“Enter into a relationship with the universe, relationship as alive, as active, as vital as any other relationship. Then know that you are connected to the world and everything init. Know that the universal love, Divine love, is real and you are an important part of it.” -Melody Beattie, Journey to the HeartI

Life has a funny way of bringing us full circle.

Six years ago I was running bars and restaurants and I was having a blast! After a long work week, I’d cozy up on the couch with my dog, Beau Jackson and my cat, Charles and let my body and mind quite down.

Once I was really quiet, thoughts would start bubbling up. I’d start thinking about my feelings and where I wanted to go, and just the kind of woman I wanted to be. I didn’t quite know how to sort it all out - so I did what came naturally. I wrote. I wrote and wrote and started to share my thoughts via a blog. (This was bold stuff back then!) I was an aspiring writer, but didn’t yet have the language for it.

I spent years blogging about my feelings. It was both rewarding and brave. Every time I shared a blog post it revealed tender parts of me while at the same time encouraging others. And after a while, I found my style, my tone, as a writer.

I started to gobble up books to be inspired and to learn. One of those books was Eat, Pray, Love. The decision to crack open Eat, Pray, Love was in hindsight, seminal. Elizabeth Gilbert infused courage into my heart as a woman and as a writer. She gave me permission to change, to love, to hurt and to seek.

In 2013, I got wind that Infinite Love, a community organization in the Rio Grande Valley, centered around love and meditation, was hosting Elizabeth Gilbert as a speaker - and I was over the moon delighted. Elizabeth Gilbert!!!! What an amazing opportunity. I was so happy just to be in her presence, I was swimming in gratitude.

That night I told her that her book changed my life and that I wanted to write a book one day. She hugged me and spoke encouragement over me and I left with a full heart.

——

On Wednesday May 1st, 2019, six years later, Infinite Love, the same organize that invited Elizabeth Gilbert, invited me to speak to their community.

I looked down the barrel of time and all the changes that had transpired and then it hit me.

It took six years, but I did what I set out to do. I put one foot in front of the other and designed the life I wanted. I changed careers, wrote and published a book, became a public speaker - and most importantly I found a way to not only be fulfilled but to be of service to my corner of the world. I have found a way to give my readers and audience members permission to change, to love, to hurt, to seek.

At Oprah’s Live the Life you Want Tour in 2014

With my girls celebrating the release of my book at Book People in Austin, 2017

At a Barnes and Noble Book Signing in 2018

Speaking to a group of college students at South Texas College in 2019

Life has a funny way of bringing us full circle.

—

The gathering of folks at Infinite Love on May 1st was holy.

There were men and women of all ages. There were men ready to release emotions and cry into my shoulder. One whispered, “One more hug please,” as his tears dried off.

There were women who told of traveling hours just to be there. There were moms who told me stories of their fractured relationships with daughters, clinging to hope.

There were people ready to pull the veil back and truly look at themselves. There was a husband in trucker hat and boots and a wife in a cardigans and flip flops, who wanted to connect and take their relationship to a deeper level.

There was a young college student who wanted encouragement because money was tight, a tired mom who wanted relief from her trauma filled past, and an eager mom and teenage son who traveled from North Mexico to come be a part of this event, this gathering.

Appearances would show a motley crew, but I know better. There’s nothing motley about souls who gather in that way.

As a speaker, I prepare months ahead of time. By the time I show up I have honed the information and my delivery hundreds of hours. I know what story will fit where and when to throw in a joke. And yet, when the event begins, I let all the technical go.

When the event begins, all that is left to do is for me to SEE every audience member. Hold them, hug them, pay attention to them, give their heart and their troubles a place of rest. And so even though I am the one with the microphone, it is an exchange of energy. Me and every single person in the audience, connecting and going deeper into truth, no matter how tender.

I have always had a great audiences. Every single one has been ready to share, to connect, and go there. This group, at Infinite Love, went above and beyond that. They were so present that what could have been just another Wednesday night, was a holy moment.

A lot of healing, a lot of tears, a lot of energy shifts, a lot of hugs.

This is my job, to see and hold my readers and audience members in their most tender moments and love them right where they are at. And it’s an honor.

—

Thank you to Infinite Love and the super sisters, Malka, Alka and Saju (and the rest of the family!) for being such a vital part of the Rio Grande Valley - you make a difference everyday. You are changing lives. You have made the world a better place.

Malka, Me, Saju and Alka - Three of the sisters who founded Infinite Love

You can connect with Infinite Love on their FB page or on their web page.

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Buy The Courage to Become

Shine your brightest,

Catia Holm 8/17/18 Catia Holm 8/17/18

The Courage to Become | Reagan Corbett #reagART

Hi! My name is Reagan Corbett, I am twenty-four years old and a full time artist from Houston, TX. When I say artist, I mean that I am a creator of sorts, but primarily people recognize me as painter. Although my paintings are what put me on the map, I truly believe that art, and being an artist is more than what you see on the canvas.

Growing up, the one of the things I dreamt of doing was literally being good at something. Whatever that “something” was, I knew it wasn’t going to come easy.

As the middle sister of three girls, I never knew what exactly my “thing” was. I was never the smartest girl in the class, never the best athlete on the team, and honestly never the most talented student in my art classes; but I was always the hardest worker….and I think I get that quality from my dad, which I admire him for.

So I guess my dream, in a way, was to stand out...to be seen differently than so-and-so’s little sister or someone's daughter, but rather someone who was recognized and admired for their talents and accomplishments.

I guess my desire to “stand out”, came from knowing I wasn’t spectacular at anything, and in turn, made me afraid of almost nothing. What did I have to lose? If I tried and worked my hardest at the things that remotely interested me, something good would eventually happen-- and it did.

In the spring of 2012 I was accepted to the College of Fine Arts at the University of Texas at Austin, and decided to fully embrace the next four years of my creative journey by attending UT’s College of Fine Arts. I learned a ton from my professors, studied abroad, and made exponential strides in my quantified skill level as an artist. Fast-forward to senior year of college, I had learned a lot and loved (almost) all my classes, but had no clue as to what I would be doing post graduation. I researched tons of jobs that would allow me to exercise my creativity, but nothing seemed to “feel right”. I was lost. As senior year was coming to an end I decided I needed to do something with all of the giant paintings I had created over the past few years, so I posted them on Facebook and BOOM, the messages starting pouring in. Out of nowhere a career path came into sight-- people were no longer just complimenting my work, but they wanted to buy it. I was prompted by a friend to start a separate Instagram account (@reag_art) solely dedicated to showcasing my work. I took her advice and “ReagART” was born.

As easy as that sounds, getting started was scary and hard. Right as ReagART was taking off, my life drastically changed. I graduated from college and had to move back home with my parents, lost my studio space, lost group critiques, lost my woodshop, lost the advice of my professors, and just about everything else that made ReagART “work”. After searching for numerous studios around town in Houston, I finally find someone who was willing to take a chance on a twenty-two year old artist with no credit score. After signing the lease, I remember walking into my first studio and thinking, hopefully I can sell a painting to pay next month’s rent. It was the fear of failure, losing my dream of sharing art with the world, and self-disappointment that motivated me to work the hardest I ever had, and still do today.

Screen-Shot-2017-10-23-at-12.29.07-PM.png

It’s been almost three years since I first started my career as a professional artist in Houston, and there is no doubt that if I did not work as hard as I did then, and do today, I would not be sitting here writing about the courage to become, because there would be no story to tell.

Right now, the living person I admire the most is my dad. As cheesy and predictable as that sounds he too is an entrepreneur and has unintentionally made me the worker, dreamer and schemer I am today! He’s the type of guy that leads by example, and always has the best advice.

A talent I would most like to have… I’m changing the question to a superpower I would most like to have, and that would be the ability to freeze time. I often find myself stressed, overwhelmed, and full of anxiety because there aren’t enough hours in the day. If I could freeze time, savor the moments (big or small) and get all of my work done… I might be the happiest girl on earth.

My most marked characteristic is drive and commitment to my craft. This job is not for the faint of heart. I hold myself accountable to only being as good as the efforts I put into my work, and with that mentality comes with a lot of sacrifices. Late nights, early mornings, not seeing friends, not seeing family, a lacking social life, no time for a romantic relationship, etc. It’s a trade-off, and a balancing act when I can manage it-- but for the most part my work is my life and that always comes first. If I didn’t fully believe and embrace that mentality, I know my story would be significantly different.

I have to admit that I have fallen victim to the act of comparison, so I am constantly reminding myself of the motto, “the grass is always greener”. I can’t help but envy people who get to leave the office at 5, and literally do not even have to think about work until they come back the next day. I mean that sounds pretty amazing, and somedays I would give anything for that….but then I remember, why I do what I do, and why being an artist works for me. It fulfills me, and makes me feel like I am doing my part in a society where everyone is different.

Working hard day in and day out isn’t always the most pleasurable experience, but this is all part of the bigger picture and I am confident that one day it will all pay off.

First and foremost, I am proud that I am entering my third year of being a full time artist. I am proud that I am an artist for me, and not because someone told me to. I am proud that I hosted my first solo exhibition at the age of twenty-three, and I am proud that my first ever public speech was a TED talk!

When things are looking really bad and not going well, I have to think about all that I have accomplished so far, and know that whatever this terrible moment is, it can’t be the end. I don’t know what my story is in full, or how it will end up, but I know that it won’t end on a bad note or because I was forced out. Another huge motivational force that keeps me going are my collectors and the people that have continued to support me and my career-- letting them down, would be my greatest fear; so giving up is simply not an option.

To any women out there who are about to embark on the journey of becoming an artist I have some words of advice:

Do not let the fear of the unknown stop you, instead let it fuel you to create your own path
Be confident in yourself and in your work, there will ALWAYS be someone who tries to tell you otherwise.
Do it for the passion, not the money
Take all the advice you can get
You are your biggest motivation. Whatever it takes-- get it done!

Essay by: Reagan Corbett

Instagram: @reag_art #reagART

All the art featured was created by Reagan Corbett and if you love it, (which why wouldn't you?) go on over to her Website and browse!

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

2-catia-hernandez-holm-tedx-speaker-author-the-courage-to-become-boo.jpg

Catia Holm 8/17/18 Catia Holm 8/17/18

The Courage to Become | Takisha Shelby

My name is Takisha Shelby, I was born and raised in Lubbock, Texas. The Lord blessed me to see 41 years this past 3rd of February. I'm very thankful for that.

Looking back over my life, I can see how the Lord has played a role in it the whole time. I have been through a lot my 41years living on this earth, but I give all the glory to none other than that man above my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

My story of becoming begins about 15 years ago, I was about 26 years old working two jobs. My full-time job at Lubbock Independent School District as a Special Education Teaching Assistant and my part-time job as a Food service worker. I was no stranger to hard work back then and still not to this day.

It was the weekend after working my full-time job I was at my part-time job. I had been dealing with a headache the whole day I thought it was a sinus headache. I had also gotten suspended the rest of the weekend from my part-time job because of some attitude issues I was having.

Only to find out it was all due to what was going on with me physically and medically.

I was supposed to go out that night but didn't due to my headache. I ate me something, thinking that would help but it didn't so I took me some allergy medicine, decided against going out and went to bed. I was awakened in the early morning hours by a bad headache. My head was hurting me so bad to the point I was crying.

The guy I was seeing at the time told my mom he was going to take me to the hospital, which he did. At the hospital, after running some tests and waiting for what seemed like an eternity, the doctors came out and told us what was going on.

By this time my mom had come up there, the doctors had told us that I had a tumor on my brain, in fact; I have several tumors on my brain(looking like little snowflakes all over my brain) but the one they were worried about was the one which was blocking the plumbing and was causing me to have the headache.

The doctor said that it was unusual because it had fluid around it, they would have to admit me into the hospital, go in and put tubes in my head to drain the fluid from my brain before they would be able to do the actual brain surgery to remove the actual tumor causing the problem.

So now, I'm about to be admitted into the hospital because the situation is serious.

They put the tubes in my head so that the fluid could be drained off my brain. A few days later they did the actual brain surgery. The surgery was supposed to take about 17 hours but ended up taking about 11 hours, but God.

Thinking back to that time, I know that the Lord was with me, because after the surgery I was able to see my mama for a few minutes and once I saw her although they had given me medication to sedate me I knew she was there and I was pretty much aware of everything going on around me.

I remember her telling me that she couldn't stay long, and she would see me later.

When she told me that I wasn't trying to let her go, they ended up asking her to leave so I could get some rest, giving me more medication so I could get me some rest.

About a week and a half later, I was out of the hospital on my way to recovery.

I can honestly say that if it wasn't for God bringing through that situation I wouldn't be here right to this day. I feel this more so now at this point in my life than I ever did before. It was by God's grace and mercy that I didn't have to have any therapy only a little speech therapy.

After the surgery because the area where it had occurred was affected, I wasn't able to form complete thoughts; leading us up to that point. After all that had taken place, look at God! Until now I never in a million years would have thought I would be where I am.

This was the beginning of my spiritual journey. I thank God daily that He has blessed me to see another day up to this point. I have always stood on His Word, in Philippians 4:13, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, which is my motto; and the basis of my faith.

It took me a while to move on after the surgery, thanks be to God!

It was only the summer that I was out of work, I was able to return to work at Lubbock Independent School District after that. Praise God!

If there was any advice I had to give to anyone going through this or someone who have gone through anything like this, it would be to hold on to your faith. Pray, pray, and if it still feels hopeless pray some more.

If there is one thing that I have learned throughout this whole experience it is this: Prayer changes things. I know that, without any doubt in my mind.

Just as I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me your readers too can do all things through Christ who strengthens them.

Essay by: Takisha Shelby

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 8/7/18 Catia Holm 8/7/18

The Courage to Become | Jill Faulkner

“Listening to your heart is not simple. Finding out who you are is not simple. It takes a lot of hard work and courage to get to know who you are and what you want. - Sue Bender”

Working on myself is the hardest work I have done to date, and the most worthwhile. But seriously, the hardest. Embarking on the journey of changing who I was at my core, which was really un-becoming my current self to get back to who I was meant to be, started a long time ago, and will continue until I die. Perhaps morbid, but also true. Self-work, like change, is constant. And YOU are the constant in your life. Realizing that this person (me) is all I have, and all I need, fueled my desire to live my best life. This is not to say that I do not have family and friends and support, or want all of those relationships in my life, but I control my happiness, I create my life.

As I have shifted my thinking, and perspective, I hope to encourage people to do the same. I want people to shift how they think. How they think about themselves, their lives, others, and the world around them. The shift is so magical. Daunting, and challenging, but the results are awesome. I wouldn’t be here, right now, in this moment, even writing this, had I not buckled in for the ride of a lifetime. Pursuing a life I desire. Becoming more of who I am meant to be. Stepping into a life destined to be mine.

There will always be ups and downs, which is how I got here, and maybe that’s how you got here, too. My life, and my business, Stick With It Co., were born out of a need to remind myself of how I was worthy of living the life I wanted. I needed to evolve my mindset, and my framework, and love myself so fiercely that no matter what outside forces swirled around me I stayed solid and steady. I craved the tools and sought out resources - so, countless books, YouTube videos, meditations, mantras, workshops, yoga classes, sticky-notes, therapy, and a whole lotta Oprah later, here we are.

Picture it, Austin, TX, 2015. Word of the year: Freedom. I don’t know how it came to me, or where I was, but it was my word for the year. I didn’t know at the time what I was looking for freedom from, or seeking freedom toward, but it was my word. Looking back, I also don’t know whether or not I consciously made decisions that year with “freedom” as my guide, or if it seeped into my subconscious and led the way without me realizing it. Cut to March of 2015, new job. Freedom? Cut to November 2015, fired. FREEDOM. Being let go was not a “blessing in disguise” - it was a straight up, in your face, here’s your freedom, girl. Now, what are you gonna do with it? It took almost the whole year, but here was freedom staring me in the face. I was free. Free from stress, emotionally free, and free to tap into what I really wanted to do. I was able to let go. And it was okay. I was okay. I knew it would be okay. All the stickies I had on my bathroom mirror, and kitchen cabinets got me here. In life, things are never in our desired timing, we have to give that up, let go of timing, and trust in the process.

I now had time to think about my life in a bigger way. It felt great. I also acknowledge and hold extreme gratitude for the fact that I was in a position to be able to take two weeks to just be, and figure some stuff out. In that time, I started iterating on a product, and names, and ideas, and all of the things. How could I get the concept of affirmations, and self-love to the masses? So, I just got started. Handwriting 50 different affirmations on sticky notes. Packaging them up, changing the packaging, and giving them away - to friends, family, strangers. The reactions were always positive and encouraging, which emboldened me to keep at it.

At the beginning of December (2015) a job opportunity sort of fell into my lap, and well, mama needed a paycheck, so back to work I went. Continuing to pursue Stick With It Co. on the side worked out for some time, but I wanted more. So, about a year later, I quit my job. Scary, freeing, vomit-inducing, glorious, unknown, and wonderful all at the same time. I wanted to give this business the love and focus it deserved, but it wasn’t even ever about me. It’s about you. This business is happening through me, for greater purpose.

There is a need for people to see the power of their words and statements. Especially in the world within which we exist today. We must be intentional with our words, especially the words we speak about ourselves and our lives.

Self-love, self-approval, self-accountability, self-compassion, and self-respect will generate a solid connection with yourself, allowing connections with others, driving you forward with courage, while welcoming authenticity, resilience, and support into your life.

There’s been a lot of change recently for me. Picking up some event contract work, not working on the business as intensely as I was planning to, general life happenings - you know how it goes. Physical/locational changes, and you better believe emotional - ALL the emotions. Changing, learning, experiencing, letting go, surrendering, and forging ahead.

When all these things happen on their own, I imagine life might be a bit less stressful to handle. Throw all these sizable changes into a ring together, at the same time, and they’re ducking and weaving, and throwing punches you’re not always ready for - then it can be quite the ruckus. But, change is good. Change is needed. Change is like sandpaper - rough while it’s doing its life’s work, transforming and addressing some splinters, but on the other side you’re grateful to have gone through the pain to get to a better, smoother, less splintery place.

I’m not sure I got too off the mark with the sandpaper bit, but it just popped in my brain and I went with it. The point is, change can be painful. It hurts. Sometimes you don’t know why it’s happening, and sometimes you never find out why it did, but you have to trust it’s for the greater purpose for your life. All the changes are for reason. Maybe that reason is you just learn to love yourself a little more than the day before.

I believe the desire for human connection, with ourselves, and with others, is innate, and if we work to push aside the societally driven, culturally manipulated “things” that get in the way of connecting, we are on our way to living an authentic, and purposeful life. Being an open book, sharing my journey, sometimes whether or not you asked, and sometimes a little TMI, has proven time and again that we are such similar creatures and have so much to offer each other. Through connection, we not only discover the lives and journeys of others, we also learn a lot about ourselves.

I have certainly had my moments, and sometimes 24-seemingly infinity hours, of living in fear in which I am paralyzed, and therefore lack direction, and action. In those days I forgive myself, I acknowledge and thank fear for letting me know something I didn’t know before, and I work to find my way back to faith.

I consciously make a choice to live in faith. I have faith in the process of becoming, and unbecoming who I am, figuring out my purpose and place in this world, pursuing a life I am meant to live, feeling all of my feelings, and enjoying it all.

Stick With It to BE self-love, Stick With it to RELEASE fear, Stick With It to BE whoever, and whatever your heart desires. Stick With It to allow yourself to live your best life. Stick With It in order to un-become who you were to make space for change and embark on a journey of becoming that will astound you.

A customer from England sent an incredible letter, card, and polaroid photos of where she placed her affirmations in her home!

Essay by: Jill Faulkner

These days you can find Jill at: Stick With It Co // Instagram // Facebook

1-catia-hernandez-holm-tedx-speaker-author-the-courage-to-become-book-coach-confidence-joy-mom.jpg

Hi there!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I wrote a book - The Courage to Become, I speak - TEDx #choosejoyordie, I coach, I mentor) are hope, joy and empowerment. I am all about big picture health and wellness.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 7/16/18 Catia Holm 7/16/18

The Courage to Become | Jessica Rockowitz Fielder

My name is Jessica Rockowitz, and I’m a mom of three – Hayley (13), Colin (4), and Graham (2). When people first meet me, I usually have one or both of my boys in tow. They’ll often ask if I have other children – I’ve admittedly grown fond of the looks on their faces depicting sheer shock and sometimes horror when I inform them that I also have a teenager.

“But you look far too young to have a teenager!” they exclaim, taken aback. I smile and nod, now accustomed to this song and dance – and so my story begins.

My path to motherhood was one that I unexpectedly embarked upon at the ripe age of 17. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. As a straight A student with dreams of an Ivy League school and a career in medicine, I was supposed to spend my junior year of high school studying for the SATs and flipping through college guide books – not scrambling for extra money so I could scour eBay listings for gently used baby items because I could barely afford to put gas in my car.

When I was about six months pregnant, my mom told me about a young parent program that her friend had heard about on the radio. The program was through a traditional four-year college that had about six spots for young, unmarried parents to live on campus with their children. The program also included room and board, a meal plan, and childcare for a very discounted rate. There was a catch, though – the program was located across the country from my mom and sister, who were a big part of my support system at the time. I was afraid that I’d be unable to raise my daughter without them, but I also knew this was our best shot at the life I envisioned for us. As silly as it sounds, I had dreams of a house with a playscape, Disney World vacations, and overnight camp. When Hayley was just shy of nine months old, I loaded her and our giant suitcase onto the plane to embark on what would be a truly life changing journey for us.

I wish I could detail everything that happened during those years at college, but that would be a novel in and of itself. I graduated college with a 3.9 and a BS degree in Biotechnology, accepting a research position at Harvard University for that coming fall. My daughter was almost six at the time and truly thriving, and I was getting married that winter.

I remember that the week I graduated college, I cut my Food Stamps card into tiny pieces, so proud that I would be able to stand on my own two feet. We signed the lease on a gorgeous apartment right outside of Boston in a safe, beautiful school district. We were financially and emotionally thriving – life was good, and we were happy.

Despite this, something gnawed at me and continuously stirred this feeling in my heart that I was unfulfilled. I beat myself up about this on a regular basis. What was wrong with me? Why wasn’t I satisfied with this beautiful life that I had worked so hard to create? I was always taught that the path to success looked something like this: attend the best college you can get into, land a great job, and work hard to climb up the career ladder. This was the linear path that I was on, so why was I so unhappy? I loved working with people and making a difference in their lives. In my current research position, this component of my passion was really lacking. On top of my work, I had been mentoring other teen parents and young moms for years, and it was a huge passion of mine. I told my husband that I wanted to go back to school to be an OB/GYN physician and work with young moms to educate and empower them. Life had other plans, though, and I decided to switch my career path from medicine to nursing in order to have a more flexible lifestyle because we wanted to grow our family.

Like always, I did my due diligence. I researched the best programs in the United States because just as my family had taught me, I wanted to strive for the best. I was accepted into and attended an Ivy League BSN/MSN Nursing Program. I was so proud of myself for getting in and worked hard to graduate and land what was my dream job at a low income OB/GYN clinic in downtown Philadelphia. I absolutely loved my patients. I was now a mom of two, and the working mom juggle was real. Still, I felt like I had reached an important milestone in my career and figured that the journey could only go up from here.

After a few months, that familiar feeling began to gnaw at me again as something stirred inside me and whispered, you’re not happy here. I found myself in tears on a daily basis and having a tough time getting out of bed each morning. I loved my job and my patients, but I couldn’t shake this perpetual feeling that something wasn’t right. What was wrong with me? I began to think that I was lazy and broken, and I just couldn’t figure out why I was feeling this pull to be away from what I had once again worked so hard to achieve.

While I was working in Philadelphia, I had also begun to dabble in the world of freelance writing. I signed up for a platform where I could find paying clients and began to take a deep dive into this space. I landed my first client for essentially pennies but was so thrilled that someone was paying me to write! I had always dreamt of being a writer and getting into marketing, but I was told that the world didn’t need more of us. It wasn’t lucrative or secure, and after all, I had a child to raise. Everyone persuaded me in the direction of stability, which equated to science and medicine. This was a huge reason why I had embarked on the path that I was on.

Now expecting our third (and last!) child together, my husband and I sat down one night when the kids were asleep. To this day, he still knows my heart more than anyone else in the world and is truly my best friend. He sensed that I felt the calling to not only be home for both of our kids, but to see where this career in writing could take me. I made the terrifying decision to leave the nursing profession that summer, when I was about 2 months pregnant with my now 2 year old. I never looked back, and so began my journey into the world of entrepreneurship.

----

As an adult and business owner who is constantly evolving and fine tuning my craft, I didn’t know what it meant to be an entrepreneur. From a young age, I was taught to work hard, go to college, and get a good paying job. There was no other path to success in life. It was no surprise that I felt completely broken when I didn’t fit that mold. I’d land amazing job after amazing job, only to feel empty several months into it, all passion and spark completely gone. I began to feel ashamed, and it took a huge toll on my self worth.

Now that I’m an adult, I realize all my feelings and emotions were due to the fact that quite simply, I was never meant to work for someone else. Knowing what I know now, I truly think sometimes that we are born as entrepreneurs but depending on the environment we grow up in, we don’t ever get the opportunity to realize it. Did you know that many intelligent, hard working entrepreneurs make some of the worst employees? We are the ones who have trouble with things like following authority and staying on task. I spent so much of my adult life believing that something was wrong with me, when really, I just wasn’t on the right path for me.

The most ironic part of this is that I work harder now for myself and my clients than I have in my entire life. I work more hours per week than my husband, and I love every crazy minute of it. This is what I was meant to do, but nobody had ever opened my eyes to the fact that there is an alternative to the traditional mindset of college and the corporate world.

I had always dreamt of being a writer and working in advertising and marketing, but I didn’t know what that looked like. When I left nursing, it was almost like the finality of the decision weighed heavily on my shoulders. I had just worked so hard and had gone into deep student debt for a degree I didn’t love. What did that say about me as a person? Where would I go from here?

Many people ask me how I got started in marketing since I don’t have a background in it. I was a marketing minor in college, but everything I learned then is obsolete now because of the rise of social media and digital marketing. The foundation remains the same, but the logistics are so different. When I first began freelance writing, a small start-up reached out to me and asked me to run their social media. Their premise was a safe, COPPA compliant social network for children. They offered me the position because in their words, “I was a good writer and also a mom, so I knew their audience.” Thinking that it could be a great opportunity, I took it. This was the tiny stepping stone that I needed to open bigger and better doors for myself. I was in the right place at the right time, and though the start-up ultimately failed, I then moved on to bigger and better clients who taught me even more about the incredible world of content strategy and social media marketing.

Today, I have my own digital media agency and work with clients that I love and admire. I have also recently gotten into photography and launched my own photography business that I think really compliments my agency and has sparked this newfound passion that I never knew existed. I’m so excited to see where it takes me.

I dedicate at least one hour per day to education, where I listen to podcasts, read articles, and improve my overall knowledge so I can best serve my clients and continue to grow. I have huge plans for my future and where I envision myself. Sometimes I find myself daydreaming about it, and it takes me back to those days where I thought that the only correct path in life was to choose a career from a handbook and spend your life inside that box. There’s nothing wrong with this, of course. As one of my close friends once told me, she watched her father own his own business and never have any boundaries, so she knew she wanted a position that she could walk away from at 5PM. There is so much happiness on both sides – it’s just about finding which side speaks to you, your passions, and your priorities.

Being a former teen parent, this transformation into who I am as a business owner and entrepreneur goes hand-in-hand with my transformation as a mother. I was so young when I had my daughter, and motherhood was not something I was welcomed into with open arms by those around me. In a way, I felt like I didn’t have permission to be happy and fulfilled in this role. I was supposed to struggle. It was supposed to be difficult. It wasn’t until I gave myself permission to be who I was – to leave a job that I had worked hard for, to have my second and third children – that I had the courage to really become the career woman and mom that I always felt I was meant to be, on my own terms.

I’m motivated each and every day by my family and by my desire to bring something unique and different to the world. I thrive on watching business owners reach their goals and fulfill their dreams. Being the one to help them get there is the most incredible and rewarding feeling that is almost indescribable. I no longer dread Mondays. In fact, I welcome them each week as I dive into my day’s work, able to drop it at a moment’s notice for a sick child or a school function. This is the life I dreamt of – and I’m living it.

I can’t sit here and pretend that it’s perfect, of course. I always joke that I have the best and worst of both worlds. It’s very true that I don’t have any boundaries. I work in early morning hours, late night hours, and on weekends. I work at nap time, bed time, and am guilty of using PBS Kids for a last minute sitter. Still, though, I wouldn’t change a thing. I have built this incredible lifestyle for myself, and I am so excited to see what’s next.

Here’s one thing I want young women everywhere to know –

there is no distinct path to success and happiness. It’s ok to be unsure about your future and what fuels you, even as an adult. It’s ok to feel fulfilled being a stay-at-home-mom, or not feel fulfilled as a stay-at-home-mom and know that you’re a better mom for your family when you work.

The path to joy is not linear, and you are not the victim of your own life.

If you want something, go out there and get it. There is enough for everyone, and don’t let any woman or person tear you down or talk you out of your dreams. Big risks can mean big failures, yes, but also big rewards – and is it ever a failure if we’re learning from it?

Essay by: Jessica Rockowitz Fielder

You can get in touch with Jessica here:

Jessica Rockowitz Photography Media Agency Facebook Instagram

Jessica captured this moment for us, and I love it!

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 11/22/17 Catia Holm 11/22/17

The Courage to Become | Aseky Bonnaire

“Everything happens for a reason”-says everyone when something unfortunate or inconvenient happens.

My name Is Aseky Bonnaire and I live for that quote. I’m a millennial mom raising three boys in Sunny Orlando Florida. I’m married to my high school sweet heart, and childhood crush. I like to think I have it all figured out, but I don’t, nor will I ever, but let a girl think she does haha. I guess I should go into depth more about myself. I met my husband when I was 11 years old and had THE biggest crush on him. We started dating when I was 15 and he was 16. We dated from sophomore year all throughout High School. We did homecoming dances, prom, graduation, the whole 9 yards.

After high school we both went to the local State College. After the first semester flew by, I decided, I love this college thing and I don’t want a baby to interrupt anything. I went to my OB to get a script for birth control, and that’s where I found out I was pregnant. Literally at that moment, it felt like my entire world caved in on me. I was just going to be another teen mom. I was going to live a hard life, I was never going to be able to be on my own 2 feet, and I would have to rely on my mom forever. After our family found out and all the initial shock went away, we actually got really excited to be bringing in a life into this world. Renaldo Jr (RJ) was brought into this world October 23, 2012. We were young, and didn’t know what the heck we were doing, but we knew we had each other and we wanted the best life possible for him. Throughout my entire pregnancy I stayed in school, and even a week after delivering I was going in to take mandatory tests. Renaldo (my boyfriend at the time, now husband) landed a good job, making decent money (for a 20 year old) in customer service (he still works there BTW).

We moved out of my Mom’s house when RJ was 7 months old. We moved into a townhouse 100% on our own. We saved up as much as we could from Renaldo working 5 days a week, 50+ hours, all while I was in school full time. We felt like ‘we made it’. I don’t know if you remember how it felt when you first moved out on your own, whether it was college, or when you got married, but it’s an indescribable feeling. Shortly after moving I got my first “big girl” job at the hospital working in finance. Because of that job, I took a break on school, but also because of that job, we could afford more things outside of bills. When RJ was 11 months old, Renaldo bought me an engagement ring and asked me to be his wife. For the next 12 months we planned our dream wedding, I switched departments at work so I could be home more, bought our first brand new car and went on a bachelorette/ bachelor cruise. Our wedding came and it wasn’t short of perfect. All of our childhood best friends were there, and it was just a great time with great people.

Shortly after our honeymoon we got pregnant with our 2nd son. My husband got promoted (this was his 4th promotion within the 3 years) but It was that pregnancy that I found my love for blogging, and connecting with other women via Instagram. That’s when I discovered the power of a hashtag LOL! Good pregnancy overall. He was born June 17, 2015. We brought him home to our little 2 bedroom townhouse. We knew we wanted to move into something bigger, but never thought we would be able to buy a house. Come on, we were only 22/23 years old. While on maternity leave, I got bored and saw an ad that went something like “you can have a mortgage as low as your rent!” so I called that number, one thing lead to another, obstacle after obstacle, few months went by, and we became homeowners. Shortly after becoming homeowners, I got pregnant with our third (totally not planned, I was breastfeeding. So FYI Breastfeeding IS NOT BIRTHCONTROL. It doesn’t work. Joel is proof haha) but he’s such a blessing and the perfect addition to our family. We literally brought him into the world in that home (no, seriously, I delivered him at home with no one but my husband and kids present). And now we are currently renovating the house from the floor up.

Not only were we home owners, we became homeowners at 22 and 23 year olds, with 2 kids, in the city where we both grew up, completely on our own, and not living up to the stereotype people categorized us in. There is such a negative stigma with being a teen mom. People automatically assume you’re going to live a hard and tough life. While YES, it was hard having a kid at 19, yes there were times we had no clue how we were going to put gas until the next paycheck, but did it stop us, NO! I feel that so many young moms and teen moms automatically categorize themselves and determine their future before they even give themselves a shot at anything.

Having a super supportive (emotionally and financially) partner plays a HUGE role in all of this. Renaldo and I are a team. We’re in this together. We grew up and matured together, and at the same pace, so we were always on the same page when it came to goals that we wanted to achieve. Buying a house is definitely not my ‘I made it’ moment, nor will it come from anything materialistic.

My ‘I made it’ moment came in motherhood. Because RJ, my husband worked for that amazing job he has. Because of RJ, I found my purpose. I know that being home with my kids is where my heart found a home. When I had no friends (because all my friends are normal, and have kids at a regular age) I found comfort in the community of the women of the blogging, and social media world. Making connections with other moms from all walks of life, different backgrounds, all ages, is where I found my niche. Blogging and sharing my life with other teen moms is where I found sense of belonging.

It’s amazing when something is for you, it just falls into place. When I told my husband I wanted to get back into blogging, literally opportunity after opportunity rolled in. It’s like God patted me on my back, placed the right words in my heart, and whispered, “This is for you. Share your life, share your experiences, be a light where someone is in darkness. You got this boo!”.

I know this was a lot to read, but a girl got a lot to share! I’m so thankful for crossing paths with Catia, and being able to share my story with you all! Thanks for reading and remember; whether you’re a teen mom or not, everything happens for a reason. What may feel like the end of the world is potentially a blessing in disguise.

I call this, Becoming: Not another stereotyped teen mom.

Be sure to keep up with Aseky on her web site, Instagram, Facebook and Twitter

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 10/30/17 Catia Holm 10/30/17

The Courage to Become | Emily B. Cummins

Four years ago, I decided to put permanent ink on my body. What I didn’t know back in 2012 was that those eight little letters inscribed on my wrist would become the anthem of my life and spark something remarkable in those around me as well.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always wanted everything to be perfect. My hair just right. My childhood ballet routines beautifully performed down to the last move. My high school backstroke technique flawless. Perfect A+ grades, never missing an assignment, not even thinking twice about getting a detention. Getting into the right colleges. Choosing the right career. Finding the perfect guy. Making the best of friends. Showing the world I’ve got it.

You know, that it factor that everyone seems to want.

But, in tear filled frustration, I always seem to come up short in comparison to the world’s standards.

Not pretty enough. Not the star swimmer on the high school swim team. Not the valedictorian of my class. No handsome stud on my side. No group of BFFs I share all of my deepest, darkest secrets with. It’s like perfection just wouldn’t come—no matter how hard I tried.

And that’s when it hit me.

I will never be perfect. I wasn’t created to reach perfection.

God created me exactly as He wants me to be—and in His eyes, I am perfectly made. Psalm 139 confirms that. He created me to love and embrace this grand adventure called life; the problem was—and is—that when I was striving so hard to reach what I deemed as “perfection,” I couldn’t truly live.

The words of Deuteronomy 30:11-14 are empowering me with the truth that I CAN do what God commands me to do. I don’t need to have anyone else explain it to me, teach it to me, or tell me to do it. Obeying God is up to me. I just have to do it, I just have to choose to be who God made me to be. Following verse 14, God lays out some life altering, eye-opening words that can’t help but grip me:

“Look at what I’ve done for you today: I’ve placed in front of you Life and Good, Death and Evil. And I command you today: Love God, your God. Walk in his ways. Keep his commandments, regulations, and rules so that you will live, really live, live exuberantly, blessed by God, your God, in the land you are about to enter and possess.”

(Deuteronomy 30:15-16, the Message)

Live exuberantly. Really live.

I want that. I want to live free of the distractions of wanting to win popularity contests. Free from fighting so hard to be perfect. Free from avoiding messy, real, authentic relationships. Free from being so afraid of getting hurt. Free from trying to avoid failure so intensely. Free from striving to win the approval of others. Free from the icy grip of shame. Free. Free to LIVE.

Each of us are on a journey. Our stories are being written day by day and I believe our stories have the potential to really do something, to change the world. But only if we let them.

It really boils down to one thing: who will I trust to write my story? Me or God?

Perfection screams, “Choose me! Choose me! Only I can control how everything turns out.” But the kind of living Deuteronomy 30 shares whispers the truth, “Choose God. He IS life. If you choose Him, you choose life.” When I choose to open my hands and release my grip on false control, I’m no longer striving to “do” anything; I’m simply “being” in His presence, trusting Him to “do” for me that which only He can do.

I am becoming, becoming who God made me to be.

Each day a page of my story is being written into the threads of time and being woven into the very fabric of who I am. As I stand looking at the pages before me, I’m making a daily decision to choose to embrace this grand adventure called life and to trust the God who created me in the first place to continue to write the story of Emily. I am choosing to be her.

One of my favorite quotes from Shauna Niequist explains it this way: “This season is about becoming…walk closely with people you love, and with people who believe God is good & life is a grand adventure. Don’t get stuck in the past, and don’t try to fast-forward yourself into a future you haven’t yet earned. Give today all the love and intensity and courage you can, and keep traveling honestly along life’s path.” (Shauna Niequest, Bittersweet)

And that is why I chose to have “becoming” tattooed to my wrist. Every single time I look at my left hand, I’m reminded that life is a grand adventure. I’m reminded that the pursuit of perfection isn’t what God created me for. I’m reminded that I am made perfectly in Christ. I’m reminded to trust Him to write my story. I’m reminded to live exuberantly. But, most importantly, I’m reminded to embrace becoming me.

And from where I stand today in 2017, this idea of “becoming” is permeating everything I do and has sparked a movement of women around the world through BecomingMe.TV.

It’s embedded in my writing, ingrained in my thoughts, and interwoven in my conversations with those around me. It’s taken root in the reason why I get out of bed every morning and the hope I hang on to when the rain clouds come. Its my passion, my heart’s cry, my word.

I see women around me becoming who God made them to be too. I see them courageously battling life’s struggles and risking loving people who just might not love them back. I see them trying, setting aside the fear of failure and running towards incredible victory. I see life change. I see redemption. I see courage. I see becoming.

My battle cry is to invite women on the personal and courageous journey of becoming who God made them to be. That’s why I turn off my alarm clock and get out of bed each morning. That’s why I write. That’s why I dream. That’s why BecomingMe.TV exists, partnering with women as they’re becoming who God made them to be too through Blog Series, Becoming Stories, and Events. In becoming me, I see those around me becoming too and can’t help but be inspired and encouraged on the journey.

This journey isn’t just mine. We are all becoming and I want to invite you to join me. It’s time we lace up our boots, throw fear and perfection into the wind and live fully. Let’s be who God made us to be. Together, let’s become.

Essay by: Emily B. Cummins

Guys, don't you want to go see Emily in person? ME TOO!!!!!! She is doing big, huge things to remind us that we are loved just as we are and that we were made perfectly. God didn't overlook qualities when he knitted us together - we have all that we need to live our lives well, richly and full of love and purpose. Thank you, Emily!!!!!

Emily’s Instagram: Emily’s Twitter: Emily’s Facebook:

BecomingMe.TV Website: BecomingMe.TV Instagram: BecomingMe.TV Twitter: BecomingMe.TV Facebook:

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 10/9/17 Catia Holm 10/9/17

The Courage to Become | Angela Lally

Tonight we are so happy to be featuring Angela Lally. She shares a wonderful, uplifting word. I know her trust in the Lord will inspire you!

What was your first job?

My first job after college (well, after working at a summer camp!) was in Communications and Public Relations.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?

What I'm doing now! Haha But really, ever since I discovered I had a natural knack for photography in high school, I dreamed of somehow doing it full time, but I always thought that it wasn't possible for me to actually make a living doing just photography. Thankfully, the Lord had bigger plans for this talent He's given me and lined up numerous circumstances and opportunities to lead me to where I am today: Two years of running my photography business full time!

How did it feel getting started?

A bit nerve-wracking, freeing, and exciting, all at once! I knew this was where the Lord was leading me, so I was comfortable with the "uncomfortableness" of it and from the beginning trusted my business to Him. Ultimately, I know that despite any efforts I make on my own, any accomplishments, all the hours put into it, it is all His. He is the one that gives and provides, and I am so thankful that He's continued to do so in a way that allows me the gift of doing what I love as a career.

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you got started.

One of the biggest obstacles I faced after figuring out that I one day wanted to quit my full time Communications job to run my business full time was being in between both of those things: Knowing that at the time I needed that job and trying to be present and fully there after knowing that it wasn't what I wanted to do forever.

I did learn through that process that when the Lord is ready for you to move on, he makes it CLEAR.

My initial plans were to go full time into photography in two years... two months later, that turned into me planning on leaving at the end of that year, which then turned into me leaving on a Friday and giving my two weeks notice on Monday. Looking back, I can recognize that a lot of that was Him getting me to the point of trusting him FULLY with providing and not depending on my savings account as a safety net. Since making the transition to full time, He has grown my business and given me favor in ways that I never would have imagined and faster than I could have hoped.

My verse for my business from day one has been Psalm 16:5: "The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot." It reminds me to trust the Lord's provision and to be satisfied with whatever He gives, however he choses to (or not to) give it.

What keeps you motivated?

I absolutely LOVE the idea of getting to capture people's genuine personalities and relationships in a photographs!! Apart from knowing the Lord, people and the relationships we have with them are the most important thing in the world. To be able to capture that in a tangible photograph is such a gift. Photographs can communicate so much more that we can say with our words and can open eyes to see things that may have otherwise been missed. I've seen senior girls recognizing that they ARE pretty for the first time after seeing an image on the back of my camera. I've captured cherished moments for clients with family members that are no longer here. I get to witness and document marriages of couples who have said the MOST important thing on their wedding day is that God is glorified. And as long as the Lord wills, I will keep capturing as many of these moments and people that I can.

Which living person do you most admire?

My mom - 100%. Throughout all of the crazy circumstances she has been through in her life, she has remained steadfast in trusting the Lord and having faith in Him to do what He has said He will and to be who He has promised He is. I don't know anyone else who has a stronger faith than she does.

Which talent would you most like to have?

I would LOVE to be able to play the piano!! I know a little bit from friends teaching me / YouTube videos here and there, but I don't actually own one... so I guess I need to fix that first! Perfect pitch would be a fun one too!

What is your most marked characteristic?

Apart from photography, I think my friends and family would say my relationship with the Lord. Or that I am friendly and "sweet." :)

What is your motto?

The past four years have been some hard ones. There have been a lot of transitions, uncertainties and circumstances that I wasn't expecting, and Lord has kept bringing me back to the first few verses of Psalm 37:

"Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will act... Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him..."

These verses have been a "home base" for me the past few years and have helped ground me and remind me where to stay focused when I was uncertain of everything else.

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?

Owning and running my own business for two years full time, for sure! Another one would be growing to a point where I could hire my mom to work with me.

What keeps you going when you feel like you are knee deep in mud?

Only the Lord. When I get overwhelmed, stressed or anxious, it's most likely because I'm not fully trusting Him, I'm placing more value on things that ultimately aren't as important as what He has placed in front of me to care for, or for whatever reason I'm struggling with trusting where He's leading when I can't see the next step. Spending time with Him and in the Word keep me grounded.

What’s one piece of advice you’d give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

Trust the Lord's hand at work in your life and HIS timing. Also, be faithful where He has you with what He has placed in front of you to care for. Don't try to rush ahead or just wish away the hard seasons... those are often the ones I have learned the most about His character in. It sounds cliche, but keep the main thing (Him) the main thing, and keep trusting Him with the rest -- even if it's over and over every day. He's patient with us, His plans are greater, and He will never fail.

Angela's words and trust in God are inspirational and frankly - peaceful. Her words remind me that God's got it under control and we just have to trust.

She is seriously beyond delightful and I know you'll want to follow her journey!

You can find Angela here on her web site, Angela Lally Photography and on Facebook and Instagram.

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 10/3/17 Catia Holm 10/3/17

The Courage to Become | Katie Taylor

Hi, I’m Katie.

I think I may get personal with this, which is kind of unlike me. I love talking about what I do: I’m a mom, a wife, a child life specialist, a friend, a daughter, a sister, a blogger and even a podcast host. I’m actually pretty proud of myself about all these things, I worked REALLY hard for a lot of them, so I love talking about them. But, rarely, do I talk about a part of my life that was incredibly transformative:

I got divorced.

A lot of people look at me, like, YOU?! You got DIVORCED? Yep, sure did. And, to say it was a difficult part of my life is an understatement. To say it was a “valley” doesn’t go deep enough. To say it was the hardest decision I’ve ever made… well, that may be pretty accurate.

And the truth is that I will never say that I regret getting married (the first time), because as much as a cliche as it is, I learned so much about myself.

So when Catia asked me to write in her Courage to Become series, I originally thought that I’d talk about following my dream of being a child life specialist and then creating an opportunity to host a podcast, but that would be too easy. However, talking about the Courage to Become Myself, which is what I did that day in 2012 when I moved out of the home I shared with my ex-husband, is hard as hell.

I let a lot of people down when my marriage ended. Him, his family, mutual friends, my own friends who didn’t understand and wedding guests that had spent hundreds of dollars to attend my wedding across the country barely a year before. For a Type 2 Enneagram “Need to be Needed” person (I learned this in marriage counseling the first go round), letting people down KILLED me. Literally, it felt like a knife in my stomach every time the thought crossed my mind.

But, with the help of a counselor, I took a step back and looked at my relationship for what it was and what it was giving to me. It wasn’t doing much for me. So with a family behind me who supported me unconditionally, I took a step away.

Yes, I’m incredibly lucky that I had a safety net of people with their arms wrapped around me, but the truth is, what I did took courage. I stepped away from what I thought was a sure-thing, the-rest-of-my-life, secured-future and I went into the unknown.

Leaving was lonely as hell, even with a friend in the same apartment building as me. Even with a boss and friend who opened their arms and their homes and took me in the week I left. Even with a mom and dad who flew to my city to help me move, it was lonely. I cried a lot. Going to bed alone, watching House Hunters (I had always pictured how the two of us would be in a house), only pouring one cup of coffee.

But, that part was the valley for me, and the good part about the valley is that there is a peak afterward. I continued seeing a counselor, I poured myself into work, and I vowed that if I ever loved again (which I thought would never happen), I would make sure that the person I loved truly loved me for everything that I was. If he didn’t, no big deal, he just wouldn’t be right for me. As terrifying as it was to leave, I truly left stronger than I did entering that relationship.

I thought that dating would be scary, it had been so long since I had thought about someone else in a loving way. Of course it was in some ways, but in others, it wasn’t… because I was dating FOR ME. If they weren’t interested, I had nothing to lose, I had already lost it all. If they didn’t meet my expectations, no big deal, I’d just say goodbye.

I guess I just had come to the conclusion that it will only take ONE person to meet the expectations I had set for my life. Just one. My expectations were no longer “too high,” because they were mine, I determined them based on the life that I wanted. And that was incredibly freeing.

So, while I continue to go on this journey of the Courage to Become… Me, I am proud of myself for stepping into the unknown and leaving the comfortable. Because of the path I chose, I’m now on the road to living my best life, with a husband by my side who met every “high” expectation I had (with ease), with a son who brings me more joy than my heart could ever dream of, and with a career that fulfills my soul on a daily basis. Yes, there are valleys, yes there are challenges, but it seems as though treading through the dark parts has consequently brought me to the light.

Guys, Katie is full of heart. She DEFINITELY makes the world a better place.

To listen to her amazing podcast - click here. You can find, Child Life On Call, on Facebook and Instagram and iTunes of course!

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Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 9/4/17 Catia Holm 9/4/17

The Courage to Become | Dala Thomas McDevitt

“If you can’t tolerate critics, don’t do anything new or interesting” –Jeff Bezos.

I had done everything I was supposed to. Graduated high school with honors and got into the University of Texas at Austin. Responsibly worked throughout college and maintained a 3.8 GPA. Graduated in 4 years and got a job as a Labor & Delivery Nurse. Took out a lease on a Honda Civic, and began paying off the impressive student loan debt I had accrued in my pursuit of happiness. I hated Mondays and drank on Fridays, just like everyone else.

My life was cookie-cutter perfect on the outside, but inside there was an ever-present emotion of discontent and disconnect with “who” I was. Recently out of a bad relationship and living alone for the first time in my life, there was never a better time for a fresh start. With little idea about what was going to make me happier, I decided to eat healthier and workout, as these were seemingly the societal go-to’s to “feel better”. It’s always the small things that end up being the bravest and biggest steps to self-discovery.

When I cut out the crap food, I wasn’t so tired all the time. When I cut out the alcohol, I wasn’t so hungover each morning. When I started working out, it sparked a relationship with my body that wasn’t rooted in shame and self-consciousness. As my body healed, my mind was revitalized and suddenly filled with curiosity and creativity. Now willingly rising with the sun each morning, I increased my productive time by 30% and had to seek out new hobbies. Because health had been the catalyst to this awakening, I dove deeper into the subject.

Knowledge became my mentor, my body my subject, experimentation my best friend, and, interestingly, Instagram my medium of expression. I voraciously explored audiobooks, documentaries, articles, blogs, YouTube videos, anything that helped me learn more about the mind-body connection and how to enhance it. I shared my experiences through Instagram, becoming increasingly open and public about my journey, my trails, and my errors.

My acquisition of knowledge slowly engulfed previously unreachable beliefs of self-worth, self-love, mindfulness, meditation, revolutionary ideas of sexuality, and the overwhelming realization that love is most powerful of all.

I was happier, healthier, more confident, and more positive than I had ever been in my life, so you can imagine my surprise when I began receiving more negativity from others than ever before.

I was told that my new comfortability with my body was slutty, that my fervor for health was an eating disorder, that my positive rhetoric was a guised cry for help, that my aversion to alcohol and junk food was seeded in obsessive vanity, that my new lotus tattoo was impulsive and self-destructive, and my new hair cut my Britney Spears meltdown moment. It was remarkable to see how many were threatened by my campaign to like myself.

How am I supposed to keep doing what is making me happy if my loved ones are telling me I’m in desperate need of help? Don’t they know me better than anyone? Shouldn’t I listen to them? Aren’t they just trying to help me?? The alienation I felt was profound.

As I submitted to the dark loneliness I perceived to be inevitable, I was shocked to find the loneliness was more of welcoming adventure. I was content to be alone because I, for the first time, enjoyed the company. I was okay exploring my next steps without the consultations and opinions of others because I didn’t feel I needed their approval anymore.

What a revelation! My name is Dala Thomas: I like myself, I trust myself, and I have within me the courage to become the very best and most loving woman I can be.

I used social media and devoted myself to disseminating ideas of positive body image and self-love, to the creation of meal plans and workout programs to guide others in improving health, and to online coaching so that perhaps I could help other alienated women feel safe and supported.

I began to live differently, to dress differently, to carry myself differently and to speak of myself differently as the joy I felt impregnated all facets of my life. I was bursting with affection and inspiration, and knew that I was never hurting anyone else despite what problems some took up with my new lifestyle.

I had finally learned how to share my light with the world, and it was this light that found Sean and brought him to me.

Strangers on social media became my closest allies. They did not ever know the “before” Dala, only the one they saw in front of them and therefore had no inherent aversion to my transformation. The only difference between these humans and the ones originally in my life was that they did not have to endure or understand change.

As a year came and went, I saw friends and family re-enter my life when the danger they purported disintegrated to a faint illusion. I thought accepting them again after so long would be difficult, but there was now so much peace in my life that forgiveness was second nature.

The most challenging part of my journey was finding the courage to become something other than what my closest friends and family already knew me as. People will warn you not to embark on a new journey, but only because they cannot yet see your destination, and fear is the most powerful motivator of all. Your path may go against the grain of your peers, but that not does mean it is wrong. The road to self-discovery may at times be lonely, but it is better to know yourself than to know a hundred others. Act in love, and you will never be lost.

This self-realized, joyful, life-giving women is what I had to find the courage to become. The “what” is not important here; we all can and should become thousands of different things. Courage itself is the vital ingredient, giving life to your dreams and a blind eye to doubt. Muster the courage to get to know yourself, and you will find your “what”. Then share it with the world and realize the true potential of how beautiful you can be.

Dala is partnering with Kendra Scott on September 6th. Kendra Scott is giving back %20 of proceeds to Hospitals! I will be there, Dala will be there and so will other amazing women. We'd love to see you there!

Kendra Scott - September 6th - 6-8pm - South Congress Location - Austin, Texas

If you'd like to keep up with Dala, and why wouldn't you? She is seriously so uplifting and empowering - find her on Instagram or on her web site. Side note - I am a student of her Booty Program - and IT WORKS! (Not sponsored - just genuinely enthusiastic) :)

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 8/14/17 Catia Holm 8/14/17

The Courage to Become | Tory DeOrian

Tell us a little bit about yourself

My name is Tory and I'm a professional children's and commercial illustrator! I work from home which means I snack a lot and go to bed really late. I could not be more grateful for my juicy creative life and I absolutely want to inspire others to reach their fullest creative potential. Some of my clients include Snapchat, Taco Bell, San Francisco Pride and Starbucks. I'm also lucky to be represented by the lovely Kelly Sonnack of Andrea Brown Literary Agency, for my picture books which are underway!

After college I started a group for young women, a creative/happiness club in which we all dedicated ourselves to a personal creative project, worked on bad habits, and essentially supported each other's creative and personal enrichment. It was revitalizing, and I dream of doing it on a much larger scale someday.

Aside from Illustration and Graphic Design, my fun jobs in the past have included: working as an intern for Disney, spending several years as a glittery children's entertainer (faerie/princess/mermaid) for Happily Ever Laughter Parties, and putting blush on people for two years as a Studio Makeup Artist for Smashbox Cosmetics. After getting my degree in Graphic Design, I went to makeup school in Portland, then two years later I moved to SoCal to earn my certificate in Children's Illustration at UC San Diego. I love school.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?

I've got two for you!

#1- Makeup Artistry. A very intimidating art form, right?! For some reason I was called to it toward the end of my senior year in college so I went to Portland for a 3 month makeup program. After earning my Makeup Certification I was able to do makeup alongside freelance Graphic Design + Illustration and it ended up being a wonderful job where I met all different types of amazing women. I'm so glad I faced my fear...My first day of makeup school I hardly knew what blush was even for.

Makeup ended up being an excellent career option, but Illustration was always my calling. So:

#2- Illustration...Except, Illustration never made me feel afraid! It was something I would do to relax, calm down, enjoy myself, and impress my parents with. Learning the Adobe programs was a SCARY thought at first but you catch on quick and it's not the kind of struggle you anticipate. (DO NOT let that stop you from being a digital artist. Eventually it's like playing a creative video game where the controls are second nature.) While growing up, making art was the ultimate escape. From drawing during 6th grade math lectures, to painting late into the night in high school.

How did it feel getting started?

Making the decision to major in Art in college is when it all really started. I was originally a Psych major (because I wanted to help people) but changed my major to Graphic Design immediately after learning what Graphic Design was. Then I'd say my career really started when I got hired to illustrate for Taco Bell at VIDCON 2016. I had to travel for the opportunity but I was so grateful and excited that I would have done the job for free. Not once has it ever been about the money.

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you got started Illustrating.

The obstacles I faced starting out were mostly:

1) Quality. Frustration with the quality of my artwork. I would think "Why can't I get my art to look like I want it to? I have a vision in my head but the end result is not as good." The answer is practice, detail, and refining your technique.

2) Time. Working a day job is definitely an obstacle. But I would illustrate after I got home from work, spend 12 hours at my desk on my days off, assign myself new things every week. You have to relentlessly participate in the manifestation of your own blessings, as Elizabeth Gilbert says.

What motivates you to Illustrate?

You know that little mini happy bubbling feeling inside when something clicks? (Same when a comedian makes an entire audience laugh, or a pro basketball player makes their shot.) I love that feeling of a project coming together. It's also that I have so many tons of ideas, I get depressed and mentally agitated when I'm not working on them.

Making my clients happy is also a huge motivation. I'll spend much longer than I need to on a project in order to make sure it matches their vision.

Which living person do you most admire?

My dad. He was a police officer for 33 years until he safely retired, thank goodness. He's an artist too, and his questions about my dream to become a professional artist were never laced with doubt. He encourages me to grow and take every opportunity that presents itself. "Leave no stone unturned." He says.

Which talent would you most like to have?

If I could sing I would be on stage just like Katy Perry dressed like a cupcake wearing glittery makeup. It's hard to find an excuse to do that on stage as an illustrator!

What is your most marked characteristic?

I'm super tall so, that! But as an artist, it's my wildly colorful style that people somehow always recognize.

What is your motto?

Always have something to look forward to.

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?

Since I'm 25 years old, having done projects for several big clients AND signing an agent all within the same year is something I feel grateful for and proud of. I didn't expect so many of my dreams to come true all at once but I guess since I literally illustrate sometimes for 14 hours a day and research opportunities obsessively that's the result. Being prolific is essential to success.

What keeps you going when you feel like you are knee deep in mud?

During Oprah's Life You Want Tour, I remember Iyanla Vanzant getting on stage in all her vigor asking "Haven't you always been there for yourself??" I try to keep in mind that being stuck is all a part of the process; you've been stuck before and you'll be stuck again. As my dad says 'Don't force it!' Actually, just last night I was struggling with a pattern illustration, I woke up today and finished it by 1pm! Being that I illustrate anywhere from 8-14 hours a day, I get stuck a lot but I also get through it a lot!

What’s one piece of advice you’d give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

I could talk your ear off with advice! As a seeker of guidance and knowledge at every turn, I'm more than happy to pass along what I know.

A general piece of advice which I learned as an intern for Disney in regards to being prolific:

Don't just make one piece of art, make 10. (Numbers 9 and 10 will probably end up being your best and you'll have more work to choose from.) Don't just come up with two or three ideas, come up with 20 or 30. (This way your ideas are more unique to you.) Don't just set two goals for the day, set five. (Then when you achieve almost all if not all of them, it's more than you would just having set two.) This, I've found, has been my secret to success.

Let me break it down into categories:

If you're looking into freelance graphic-design/illustration/photography:

Make the kind of work you want to be hired to do. If you're looking at a magazine ad or illustration on an app and you think "Hey! I bet I could do that! How can I get hired to do that??" Research, research, research the opportunities out there. Obsessively build your portfolio until it's really freaking good. Keep a list of contacts of art directors and inquire about opportunities when you're ready. (For example, when I've built enough of an editorial/magazine illustration portfolio, only then can I begin to reach out to those people.) Continue to build your knowledge base through taking classes (Good online classes I recommend: Lynda.com and skillshare.com. Skillshare is the more fun and quirky of the two, Lynda offers sophisticated technical knowledge.) Once you begin to get clients, you muse never miss a deadline. I once read this advice: "Be super honest with your clients and make them happy." This is something I live by as a freelancer.

If you're looking into picture book writing and/or illustration:

There are several good schooling programs out there. I chose the UC San Diego Extension program for Picture Book Illustration, which took me a year to complete and ended up being absolutely amazing! You MUSTjoin the SCBWI and attend conferences and meetings, read the monthly SCBWI magazine/bulletin that gets mailed to you. You also must be actively working on your writing and/or illustrating several times a week if not every day when you get home from work. Make it your new obsession. Learn about different publishers and figure out what you'll need in your portfolio to be ready to query agents. Design promotional mailers you can mail to art directors. Also, join twitter because the #kidlit world essentially lives there!

Also, make a list of assignments for yourself. Research events, classes, and workshops that you can take in your free time.

If you're looking into makeup artistry:

The beauty industry is everywhere, so if you learn makeup or skincare you're likely to be able to find a job anywhere you move to. That was appealing to me. Once you learn the steps of doing makeup and understand the different types of skin (comes with experience) you're likely to get the hang of it. I like to do things step-by-step and makeup artistry ended up being exactly that! I suggest finding a makeup artistry program or taking personal makeup lessons. All of the different prestige brands (Smashbox Cosmetics, Urban Decay, IT Cosmetics- to name a few) hire freelancers to travel locally and do makeup! Shoot for those positions starting out. They pay better than makeup retail positions and you get to move around! There's also wedding makeup, working at a cosmetic counter, film and television, etc.

I was blessed to have known Tory. To enjoy her the beautiful work she did while she was on this earth, visit:

Tory on her web site and on Instagram for added joy!

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

Catia Holm 8/7/17 Catia Holm 8/7/17

The Courage to Become | Chef Keesha + Chef Gloriana | Kitchun

This Season of The Courage to Become to SO exciting!!!! More than ever I am grateful to be surrounded by strong women with amazing stories of grit, determination and HOPE.

We are kicking off Season 2 by shining a spotlight on Chef Keesha and Chef Gloriana, friends and founders of Kitchun, a company focused on providing tasty, grain-free foods.

Tonight we are doing this conversation style!

Tell us a little bit about yourself:
Chef Keesha:

I am married to my best friend of the last 14 years. We met in the military and within 3 months we were married. The best spontaneous decision I have ever made and I have made several! I have 3 wonderful, active, supportive children. I am a creative and always seeking to create the next best thing. I spend many nights dreaming of recipes and wake up the next day to make them happen. I am a Certified LeCordon Bleu Trained Pastry Chef, serial entrepreneur and health and fitness enthusiast.

Chef Gloriana:

I am a Wife (we met when we were 16), a mother of 2 incredible little boys and one beautiful baby girl. I am also a Le Cordon Bleu Pastry Chef, a creative entrepreneur and health and fitness is very important to me.

What was one thing you always dreamt of doing, were afraid to do, but did anyway?
Chef Keesha:

I have always dreamt of leaving a legacy.

And I have always been afraid of: Starting a business and attaching huge expectations of success to it. I think starting a business was the easy part... the "scary yet exciting" part has been committing to success of it. While cliché but true -- the easiest way to fail is to not even try. So ideally I fear not trying more than anything.

Chef Gloriana:

One thing I always knew I wanted to do was be my own boss. It can be scary to take on a business of your own -- with all of the responsibility on you. Luckily I have an incredible business partner and we help each other every day to get through the trials of business ownership and learning something new every day.

How did it feel getting started?

Chef Keesha:

Getting started was exciting...at times it was like "wow, we are really doing this. Creating the recipes, the design process all of the fun stuff. But there was a lot of on the job training as well. I have always had the attitude of I can do anything...so I spent a lot of time reading, studying and researching the things we needed to - to start and run the business.

Chef Gloriana:
Getting started was the exciting part -- because we didn't know all the really hard stuff ahead!

Tell us about some of the obstacles you faced when you got started?

Chef Keesha:

I think our obstacles have always been what we don't know. But they are just that...obstacles to overcome and grow from.

Chef Gloriana:

Obstacles for us have always been that we are creatives that have no business background so everything is new to us and we have to roll with the punches... and a lot of them feel like actual punches!

What motivates you to continue Kitchun?

Chef Keesha:

Much of my motivation comes from my family. I come from humble beginnings and decided a very long time ago that I would change that for myself, my Mom and now for my children. It has taken me many years to figure out exactly what it is that I passionately love to do. But better NOW than never.

Chef Gloriana:

Motivation for me is my children. I love that they get excited to see Mommy’s face in the grocery store aisle and get excited. Truthfully it feels pretty good to me too. I want my friends and family to see me working hard and that it is paying off -- and to be proud.

Which living person do you most admire?

Chef Keesha:

This is a difficult one, because I admire so many people for different reasons. Of course my Mother because of the strength I was able to witness as a kid and now as a mother myself.
My husband for his unconditional love for me and my dreams, other female entrepreneurs that have rocked the minds of so many...like Oprah Winfrey...who wouldn't admire her!

Chef Gloriana:

I tend to admire people who face a lot of challenges and overcome. Resilience is key. And my Mom is one of the most resilient people I know.

Which talent would you most like to have?

Chef Keesha:

Singing! But God knows best. HA

Chef Gloriana:

I would love to play a musical instrument.

What is your most marked characteristic?

Chef Keesha:

Lovingly Driven

What is your motto?

Chef Keesha:

I have two mottos that ring in my head at the same time. One from a Secret commercial my Aunt was in as a kid (another one of my most admired individuals) "NEVER LET THEM SEE YOU SWEAT" meaning always stay composed in each and every situation good or unpleasant. And the second one from motivational speaker Eric Thomas "WINNERS WIN" meaning do the little things each day towards your success and leave nothing to question.

Chef Gloriana:

"Lift your head princess or else your crown will fall". A little reminder to me to keep my head held high even in difficult situations.

What are some things you are proud to have accomplished?

Chef Keesha:

Personally I would have to say my family. My husband and I have committed to giving our children the best that we can, we push ourselves and each other to fulfill our own personal dreams as well as build up our children to accomplish any and all they choose to.

In regard to Kitchun, the universe saw fit to place me in a culinary class with an amazing young lady (Gloriana) who became a great friend and then business partner. Together we have combined our dream of being business owners and have created, developed and nurtured the company that we have now. To date it is our greatest business accomplishment with so much more to be revealed.

Chef Gloriana:

At home: My family, my husband and our children. I love them with every bit of my heart and I'm proud and GRATEFUL that I have that.

In business: Still making it happen every day! This is a tough business and we are challenged EVERY DAY but we keep pushing forward with success. Our 1ST Place win for HEB’S Quest for Texas Best was a pretty big accomplishment as well. We are now in 138 HEB stores!!

What are some hopes you have for your future?

Chef Keesha:

To be amongst some of the most influential female business owners of my time. For Kitchun to grow to its full potential of being a household name, filling a need in the healthy snacking market and serving a greater humanitarian purpose.

Chef Gloriana:

I hope that this business venture eventually leads to us being a household name and the ability to spend more time with my family.

What's one piece of advice you'd give to women who are about to embark on the journey you are on?

Chef Keesha:

Step out on faith and out of your comfort zone. Never fear failure, it is how we overcome the failures that make the success story so much sweeter. Make a decision to: WIN, CHANGE THE SITUATION, BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE!

Chef Gloriana:

Always ask a lot of questions to everyone! People are surprisingly willing to help when you admit you don’t know something. Also, "know what you don’t know" so you know when to ask for help. And above all, be resilient.

To keep up with these awesome ladies hop on over to Facebook and Instagram!

And don't forget to grab a bag of their snacks while you're at your local HEB. They are on my grocery list every week!

Hi friend!

I'm Catia, a woman, wife, mama, sister, sister friend, you know -- I wear a million hats just like you.

One of my biggest whys is that I want people to feel good about ALL of who they are. Including you.

The threads running through all my work (I’m an author - The Courage to Become, I’m a motivational speaker - TEDx, Choose Joy or Die , I am a private coach ) are hope, joy and empowerment.

If I could choose ten words that best describe me I would say: honest, welcoming, giving, curious, loving, earnest, empathetic, spiritual, playful, and sassy. Let's add: adventurous. That's 11.

Nice to meet you!

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Nina Berenato of Nina Berenato Jewelry

You can connect with Nina and shop her empowering pieces on:

Instagram , Facebook and her website - NinaBerenato.com

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Inez Natalia of Inner Mother Power

Hi! I'm Inez

I'm here to support your growth journey

You can reach out and connect with Inez on her website, her podcast - Start Here to Connect

Inez offers a Free Community, Safe Space for Evolving Moms, and a [Free Practical Guidebook] Get 5 Free Tools to Turn Parenting Chaos into Inner Peace, download now:

She’s also teaching and coaching on Facebook and Instagram!

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Hayley Hengst from On a Lighter Note

About Hayley:

What's changed?

What's the Same?

Other Things...

You can follow Hayley’s journey at

On a Lighter Note Facebook // On a Lighter Note

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Lisa J from BK Beauty

YouTube: lisajmakeup // Instagram: @lisajmakeup //Facebook: LisaJMakeup

BK Beauty // Instagram: BK Beauty

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Shea Jones from Austin New Church

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The Courage to Become Book

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Guys, Katie is full of heart. She DEFINITELY makes the world a better place.

To listen to her amazing podcast - click here. You can find, Child Life On Call, on Facebook and Instagram and iTunes of course!

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I was blessed to have known Tory. To enjoy her the beautiful work she did while she was on this earth, visit:

Tory on her web site and on Instagram for added joy!

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